rein me in

Monday, October 12, 2015 (7:39 a.m.)

Blessed God,

I'm here. In body. Not spirit. Or mind. My thoughts are all over the place. So here I am, asking (Matthew 7:7) You to rein me in to Your way of thinking.

I confess to not wanting to feel any more emotions. Sleep continues to be irregular. I absolutely know how blessed we are, yet I have senses of fear and foreboding as well.

Forgive me Father. I talk a good game. I claim to know and love You. And then I want nothing more than to run away and hide from discomfort.

Blessed God, guide me in Your Word. Lead me in my feelings. Enable and empower me to embrace the changes we are currently experiencing.

I do love You Holy Father. As I read (Romans 8) of Your power and goodness, I sense hope start to rise. Tears form readily while I begin internal arguments with You. There's hope. Then fear. Trust. Followed by all the “What about...”s of the past my mind keeps recycling.

We are a hurting people Blessed God. Children of Yours who don't necessarily know how to love and forgive as You would have us. We are jaded. Used to shutting ourselves off to keep from experiencing further, deeper pain.

I want to live this day surrendered to You. To Your will and to Your way. Take the fear, apprehension and distractions. They are what I have to offer You right now. My desire is to live freely in You. Your Word tells us repeatedly that is possible.

I'm choosing again to believe You. You are good. You are holy. You keep Your promises and through the “grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit” (2 Corinthians 13:13) I choose to trust that You will continue to rein me in as You know is best.

(9:35 a.m.)

Rearrange my thinking. Re-prioritize my efforts. Readjust my attitude. I give You all that I am; asking, seeking, knocking (Matthew 7:7) that You will make me into all that You would have me be. I love You, Father. Thank You for loving me. Use me I pray. To Your good and to Your glory. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(380 words ~ 9:39 a.m.)