"Just for today"

Thursday, October 8, 2015 (5:33 a.m.)

Blessed, Holy God,

Help. Please. Change is coming. Quickly. Full force. And I don't know which way to turn in it. Serenity? Courage? Wisdom? All three? At once?

At once. At the same time. I get to look to You. To Your Word. And want desperately to fear not. To not be afraid. But just for now, this very moment, I am confessing fear to You. Fear of change. Pain. Inaction. Indecision.

And in that fear I am asking (Matthew 7:7) Your guidance. Your leadership. Your wisdom. Yes, Father, Your wisdom as it is described repeatedly through Your Word.

(7:08 a.m.)

Thank You Father that You are so incredibly good to us!

Thank You for setting the sky on fire with oranges and purples and colors we rarely see in regards to our sunrises. Thank You for beauty. And hope. And courage. And the decision to look at circumstances differently.

Thank You Father that I get to cry out to You with actual tears and sobs and anguish and fear. Knowing that You alone are God and good and have Your very best to offer each of us.

I'm telling You right now, I don't always want what You give us when You give it to us. Often times it takes me much longer than others to come around. Thank You that right now I am making the decision to ask You to help me want what we have. Wholeheartedly.

There's pain. And different. And mess. And confusion. And brand new territory. And fear. SO much fear, coupled with so very many tears. AND there's Y-O-U! Wonderful, powerful You!

Father, thank You that You do NOT leave us alone in our struggle. Thank You that there is indeed GROWTH in the struggle.

Thank You that You give us choices. Deuteronomy 30:19 spells it out so very clearly.

“Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, that you and your descendants might live!”

Yes! Today... Choose life.

Thank You Father that I can fear. Yes. Be very afraid of people, places and things. OR I can fully esteem and revere YOU!

I can choose to try to eat or sleep or busy away my fearful thoughts and feelings. OR I can ♫Turn my eyes upon Jesus, Look full in His wonderful face, And the things of earth will grow strangely dim In the light of His glory and grace.♫ Matthew 14:29-31; Hebrews12:1-2; 2 Corinthians 4:16-18.

Yes. Just for today, I can choose to hope and have faith that You really, truly DO know exactly what You are doing. AND that You are going to give us the courage and the strength and the wisdom to carry it out.

Provide every single ounce of courage and power I need to be able to live this day with faith, hope and love (1 Corinthians 13:13). I love You Father. I need You Jesus. I want You Holy Spirit. Empower and embolden me for Your good and Your glory. Just for today!

Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(535 words ~ 7:40 a.m.)