That's it!

Monday, October 20, 2014 (8:09 a.m.)

(3:20 p.m.)

Shall I call it avoidance?

For three whole days I could have easily come here before now. Easily. But I didn't. Or is it really, wouldn't. And I don't even know why.

I was going to take “just a minute” to look at a brand new novel. All those hours and over 300 pages later, I turned to TV. Where was the time I was going to spend with You?

To say I got side-tracked is such an understatement. Forgive me Blessed Father. Forgive the self-centered thoughts and actions that have taken me so far away from where I really truly want to be.

Mm, and this is where I can be honest. Open. Willing. With You. Again. The moment I tell You that my heart is breaking for the sadness of others.

That's it! I've been avoiding You because I didn't want to pretend. Yet I wasn't ready to be honest either. Father, I am powerless over the pain of the world. The sadness. Aloneness. Illness. And when I allow myself to call upon You, the tears begin again.