what's what

Tuesday, April 22, 2014 (8:09 a.m.)

So,

I've sat. And waited. Thought. And rethought. Avoided. Resisted. And finally... surrendered.

Blessed Father, thank You. Thank You that I am currently not willing to pretend with You. I could say all the nice things I'm supposed to. Thank You for all of which I truly am grateful. Or I can come and say I just don't know what is going on around me. Thank You that I am choosing the latter.

Loving God, I really don't know what's what anymore. And I just smiled at the Truth of that. Have I ever really known? Or does 1Corinthians 13:12 describe me perfectly?

“For now we see in a mirror, dimly...” Yes. That's me to a T. Not knowing what I think I know. Thank You for reminding me and helping me smile about it in the process.

Blessed Father, You are so good. So holy. So perfect. And even [or is it especially?] when I come to You with a heavy non-rejoicing heart, You accept and change it right where I am.

The Voice, “For now, we can only see a dim and blurry picture of things, as when we stare into polished metal. I realize that everything I know is only part of the big picture. But one day, when Jesus arrives, we will see clearly, face-to-face. In that day, I will fully know just as I have been wholly known by God.”

How wonderful is that? I don't know! There are so very many things going on around us that I don't understand. I don't have answers. Ideas. Suggestions. But You do. You know what You'd have us do. Where You'd have us go.

The Message, “We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing Him directly just as He knows us!”

None of this comes as a surprise to You. My unwillingness to come to You directly. My questioning of circumstances. And still You love me. Wow! Thank You.

J.B. Phillips New Testament, “At present we are men looking at puzzling reflections in a mirror. The time will come when we shall see reality whole and face to face! At present all I know is a little fraction of the truth, but the time will come when I shall know it as fully as God now knows me!”

I choose to wait. To trust. Honor. Believe. Obey. Seek. Hope.

Because You so loved the world (John 3:16) and I am included in that depiction, I get to fully trust the Truth of 1Corinthians 13:13. And even here I smile again.

I felt somewhat guilty as I so curtly began our time together earlier. Now I am able to view it as the beginning of a greater Truth. The New Century Version ends this chapter of Paul's letter to the people of Corinth by saying, “So these three things continue forever: faith, hope, and love. And the greatest of these is love.”

So, Father. THANK YOU! Thank You that I get to come to You ♫Just As I Am without one plea But that Thy blood was shed for me♫ And because I DO get to come to You confessing my faults and foibles, I also get to trust You to continue Your work in me.

Do all You must to bring me to You; loving You with all of my heart, soul, mind and strength and my neighbor as myself (Mark 12:30-31). I'm willing. Please make me able. I love You. I long to serve You. And I want to do it well. Thank You Father. I love You. Amen.

(635 words ~ 9:25 a.m.)