power and direction

Sunday, January 12, 2014 (7:22 a.m.)

Laughlin, NV

Most Holy Father God,

I love You. I've been gone. From here. From You. From myself. Just 'gone'. I can't explain it. Don't even know if I'd want to try.

Will You talk with me? Order my thoughts? Put into action the things You want done by me. I've been calling myself lazy when maybe that isn't quite accurate. Is it undisciplined? No. I don't think that's it. Unmotivated? No. Unsure. Uncertain. Undecided. Hmmm.

There are things I've learned this past year. Important things. Things that matter. And the seemingly most important of them all is that people matter w-a-y more than things! I've spent a good amount of time watching lately. Sitting. Observing. Watching. Waiting. And through it all, looking to You to guide and lead my next step.

Blessed Father God, we are officially in over our heads when it comes to planned projects around the house and the ever offputting unexpected!

Father, thank You. One minute I believe myself to be one of the biggest screwups around, and the very next I am being comforted and encouraged by Paul's words to Titus.

I'm sitting here with one of the silliest grins I can remember having. My heart is growing more excited with every word I read. There's hope. Affirmation. The reminder that You know me. Not only that You know me... You LOVE me! Exactly as I am. Warts and all! Wow! Father God, I need You so much.

“Foolish and disobedient... misled by others... slaves to many evil pleasures and desires... full of resentment and envy... hated others and they hated us” (Titus 3:3). I resemble these statements! But for Your grace. Your “kindness and love” (3:4), “kindness and pity” (3:5), and “great kindness” (3:7).

The Life Recovery Bible tells me “We are justified by God's grace; that is, we are declared 'good in God's eyes' by virtue of belonging to Christ.” Far too often I forget this vital Truth!

It is because of Your great love and His selfless sacrifice that we are taken off “the performance treadmill, relieving us of the need to measure up” to Your standards. Because of Who You are and all You have done on our behalves we no longer have to try to measure up to some unrealistic ideals set for us by parents, teachers, bosses, even ourselves. The fearful guilt and anger we often carry by not being able to do and be all we think we are supposed to is assuaged by knowing You accept us. Just as we are.

You don't expect us to be perfect. You know we can't do any of this alone. You call us to holy living. Providing Your power and direction. THAT is exactly what I am seeking this morning Blessed Father. Your power and direction!

I honestly don't know the first thing that needs to be done, but I absolutely trust You to guide and direct me in it. Thank You Father. Thank You so incredibly much. I love You. Use me to serve You well this day. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(526 words ~ 8:55 a.m.)