"Back to Step One"

Sunday, December 30, 2012 (6:51 a.m.)

Holy Blessed Father,

Another year has almost past. I am thanking You for the changes You are making in me. Thank You for teaching me the importance of meeting with You every morning. I've yet to do it perfectly. There are still far too many times I let other thoughts or plans get in the way. Keep working in me and my priorities Blessed Father God.

I am supposed to be packed and ready to go this morning. I tend to take too much. This is a habit that needs to change. There are many things I want. Few I need. Show me Father. Work in and through me to Your good and Your glory.

I don't know where in Your Word to turn this morning. I'll be looking for six things today. I thought it was going to be 'children playing'. It made sense while I was awakening. Now? Not so much.

My head doesn't seem to be in the game. I keep wanting to jump up and get busy. Where do You want me Father? What do You have for me to learn?

I am reading in Mark (10:13-16) and tears are falling. I don't know what has been triggered. At first I couldn't even remember how I got here. I was looking through the Topical Index at the back of my Bible, trying to find something on 'priorities'.

Yeah. You're right. “Powerlessness”. I forgot. Seven Twelve Step Devotions [Hey! At least I have tomorrow's verse for the 12 Days of Christmas Song! Thank You very much!] Okay. Okay. Back to Step One.

Yes, Father. That is EXACTLY where I need to be. And the line for today followed quickly. Going back to step one, ♫Our True Lord gave to me, six words for saying♫ “...that our life had become unmanageable.”

Father, thank You. Life doesn't always make sense. Simple things become ridiculous. Thank You that I get to come before You exactly as I am. Confused. Fragile. Weak. Afraid. Nervous. Upset. And confess that my life has become unmanageable.

The 12 Step devotional I choose for this morning is The Paradox of Powerlessness. It correlates with 2Corinthians 4:7-10. Paul tells about “this precious treasure – this light and power that now shine within us” (v.7a) that we carry “in our weak bodies”.

“Everyone can see that the glorious power within must be from God and is not our own. We are pressed on every side by troubles, but not crushed and broken... perplexed... but don't give up and quit... get knocked down, but we get up again and keep going” (vs.7b-9).

And how is this? “Everyday we experience something of the death of the Lord Jesus, so that we may also know the power of the life of Jesus in these bodies of ours” (v. 10 – PHILLIPS).

And here is my hope. The last paragraph of The Life Recovery Bible's devotional, “Once we recognize the paradox of powerlessness it can be quite a relief. We don't have to always be strong or pretend to be perfect. We can live a real life, with daily struggles, in a human body beset with weakness and still find the power from above to keep going without being crushed or broken.”

YES! I get to admit to being powerless and trust that You will help me. ♫Six words for saying♫, “...that our life had become unmanageable.” Thank You for reminding me. Thank You for being my True Lord. My True Love! Work in me as You need to make me who You want.

I love You. Thank You. Amen.

(605 words ~ 8:25 a.m.)