courage to change

Thursday, January 29, 2015 (6:51 a.m.)

Blessed Father,

You provide our every single need (Philippians 4:19). I look in Your Word and find Truth. Hope. Joy. I look here around me and I see mess. Disorder. Confusion.

My mind wanders. It waffles back and forth between my own desire for a pathway out of indecision and what I think to be true. You are Truth. Goodness. Grace.

I've thought wrong for many years. I haven't used resources wisely or well. I want that to change. I look to You wanting leadership. Insight. Wisdom. Courage.

Yes, Blessed Father. Courage to change. There's a huge battle going on in my mind. There's all I think I know standing in opposition to how things appear. And that's where I call back to You. I want to know You. Your Truth. Your will. Your way. AND have the courage to follow it.

Work in me. Work through me. By me. For me. With me.

Reading Paul's letter to the Philippians, I realize there is SO much more in here than initially meets my eye. It is so easy for me to skim over and miss deep meaning. How would it be to truly live as though You and Jesus have given me “grace and peace” (1:2)?

I know You have. I've experienced it more often than not. But do I live each day as if that is the case? I don't think so. Am I still inclined to harshly judge and find myself incredibly unworthy at most every turn? Why yes. Yes I do.

Blessed Father, thank You for verses in Your Word that speak to me. Loudly. Thank You for the opportunity to see them freshly. Too often I read right over them. And then there are the times that I stop mid-sentence to go back and glean gold.

That is the case this morning. Philippians 1:10. “For I want you to understand what really matters, so that you may live pure and blameless lives until Christ returns.”

It's been well over a month that I have been using the phrase, “I don't care. It doesn't matter.” Often said out loud. Sometimes just thought very loudly. The Truth is, somethings DO matter! And those are what I long to focus on.

Father, thank You. Thank You for speaking with me. Thank You for drawing out the underlying guck that keeps tripping me up.

Thank You for Paul's words to his friends in Philippi. Thank You for the Illustrated Bible Handbook's description of his prayer to them. He not only wanted them to “abound in love” (v. 9). He prayed they would “have the insight to know 'what is best' that they may 'be pure and blameless until the day of Christ' (10).”

Do all You must Dear Lord that I would live as You would have me live. I love You. Thank You. Amen.