drawing closer

 Tuesday, April 29, 2025 (4:18 a.m.)

Holy God,

I apologize. I took all of yesterday and intentionally isolated. I thought it was a good idea. What could it hurt?

(6:06 a.m.)

Thank you for extra rest just now. Deep enough sleep for a dream of sorts. Now I’m asking (Matthew 7:7a) for some motivation. I confess to feeling out of sorts. Downcast. Blue. All mixed with a VERY stubborn spirit.

Yes, Father. I confess stubbornness to You right now. Along with avoidance.

I want very much for You to come alongside me and straighten out my head and my heart. They are both filled with dread and irritability. 

I am intentionally turning to and drawing closer to You Dearest Lord. I want to “rejoice and be glad” (Psalm 118:24b) in, with, by, through and for You. I can’t do this on my own.

Do all You must that I will live this day, which You have made (Psalm 118:24a) as You would have me live it. Rejoicing and always being full of joy in You (Philippians 4:4).

Isolating myself away yesterday did nothing toward “fix[ing] my thoughts on what is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and worth of praise” (Philippians 4:8). I only found myself feeling more crotchety and discontent as the day wore on.

Forgive me Father. I hate to waste. I can’t muster up the strength of Spirit it takes to worship and adore You as You deserve. I need Your presence. The fruit Your Holy Spirit produces (Galatians 5:22-23). 

I love, need, trust and want You to ♪Have Thine Own Way, Lord… Thou art the Potter, I am the clay Mold me and make me, After Thy will, While I am waiting, Yielded and still♪

Yes Father. Have Thine own way. Search me and try me. Wash me whiter than snow. ♪Wounded and weary, Help me, I pray. Power, all power, Surely is Thine, Touch me and heal me, Savior Divine♪

Blessed God, I recognize the sadness I’m feeling to be in proportion to that of others. Missed opportunities. Challenges. The hurt of broken dreams. 

♪Have Thine own way, Lord… 

Hold o’er my being

Absolute sway.

Fill with Thy Spirit

Till all shall see

Christ only, always,

Living in me♪

Yes Dearest God, empower and enable me to love as You would have me love. You. Others. Myself. With all my heart, soul, mind and strength (Mark 12:30-31).

Make it so I sing, smile, stay my mind and stand firmly on Your Word of Truth and promises. All this I ask in Jesus’s most sacred and holy name. Thank You. Praise You. Amen.

(447 words ~ 7:48 a.m.)