I want to

 Monday, January 25, 2021 (8:09 a.m.)

Holy God,

Good morning. Thank You! I love You. I was an intentional brat yesterday. Or was I really?

I had choices. Praise You? No. Attend a worship service? No again. Sulk, pull away, hold back, avoid? Yes to all of the above.

BUT!!! I was honest. I didn’t give You lip service. I struggled. I hid. I didn’t come before You because I should. I’m here now because I want to be. Is that how You would have it Lord?

Holy, Holy God, how deeply and truly I thank You. I get to wrestle and brawl within myself. Wonder. Think deep thoughts. And bring them all to the Truth of Your Word.

Blessed God, You blow me away! Turning to Hebrews 12 I am once again encouraged. The last section of verse one tells me to “run with endurance the race that God has set before us.” Father I confess to becoming frustrated and falling away.

Reading this chapter we are reminded not to squander Your grace. Holy God, I confess to doing that too. I run on the thought that You will always be here so I can just take my time. Thank You for sending me back to Your Truth.

The Revised Geneva Translation tells us in verse 14 to “Pursue peace and holiness with all, without which no one shall see the Lord.” Tall order God. Other versions say: try, strive, work at. This tells me I’m not alone in my efforts.

Continuing in The Passion Translation I’m warned, “watch over each other to make sure that no one misses the revelation of God’s grace. And make sure no one lives with a root of bitterness sprouting within them which will only cause trouble and poison the hearts of many.”

Dearest Father, how I thank You for bringing me back to wanting to know and follow You and Your Word. A footnote takes me to Psalm 34:14 where another comment teaches on the word shalom.

For years I’ve been learning “This word means much more than peace. It means wholeness, wellness, well-being…” This is where Your teaching begins again.

The continuing list adds all the more to an ever expanding understanding “safe, happy, friendly, favor, completeness, to make peace, peace offering, secure, to prosper, to be victorious, to be content, tranquil, quiet, and restful.”

One word encompassing all that. And the teaching doesn’t stop there.

“The noun shalom is derived from the verbal root shalam, which means ‘to restore,’ in the sense of replacing or providing what is needed in order to make someone or something whole and complete. So shalom is used to describe those of us who have been provided all that is needed to be whole and complete and break off all authority that would attempt to bind us to chaos.”

This is where I come to ask You Lord to empower me in being able to follow Your command on my life. “Keep turning your back on every sin, and make ‘peace’ [shalom] your life motto. Practice being at peace with everyone.” Again and again I say it’s a tall order God.

I can’t possibly do any of all You ask without the strength of YOUR mighty power (Ephesians 6:10). I need You to do it all in, with, by, through and for me. I don’t stand a chance trying to do it on my own.

I love You. I thank You. And I ask You Lord, I want to be all You want of me. Use me as You know is best. Amen.

(606 words ~ 10:38 a.m.)