an absolute "Aha!"

Wednesday, November 25, 2020 (6:28 a.m.)

Holy God,

Thank You. Praise You! I had a moment yesterday. An absolute “Aha!” moment.

Lord God, in the ultimate scheme of all things good and holy it may at first appear lacking in substance. Oh but let me tell You of the genuine gift You gave me.

A click of understanding. A switch from feeling completely overwhelmed to “I’ve got this!” Thank You Father. Praise You.

Thank You for the opportunities You have provided me to learn new things. As well as unlearn habits that don’t serve me well. Allowing me to relearn what is better for me.

Thank You Father. There truly IS a freedom in my soul from realizing a truth from my past.

And right here? A line from a hymn. What is it though? Search. Look. Try again. Here it is!

♪Open My Eyes, That I May See Glimpses of Truth Thou hast for me♪ Mm, yes Father. Do!

♪Place in my hands the wonderful key, That shall unclasp and set me free♪ That is exactly how I feel this very moment, Lord. Free! Free to forgive. Myself. And others. Free to learn that which has eluded me for very close to six decades.

All of this has to do with almost 60 years of piano playing attempts. How long have I blamed myself for not having practiced enough? Even pointed my finger at the parents for seemingly setting me up to fail.

Until yesterday when I sat, attempting a brand new to me lead sheet of Leonard Cohen’s ♪Hallelujah♪ I “got it” Lord! Not only that, I FELT it! Complete with chills. And later? Tears.

You did this in and for me Lord. This desire to play is bigger than myself. It goes deep in my heart. And yesterday? A brief moment that allowed me to truly play. Not work at it. Just relax and truly experience what was taking place.

Fingers freely finding the keys that the written notes prescribed. Amazing. Never having happened before. I truly rejoiced Lord.

And I revel in the remembrance of it this morning. Again the lightness that comes from forgiving mistakes from the past. Yes Lord. There is such power to be found in forgiveness. Keep reminding me Father.

Your Word tells us repeatedly to love and forgive. Keep teaching me Lord. I caught a glimpse yesterday and I feel refreshed for it.

Psalm 119:18. The Passion Translation. “Open my eyes to see the miracle-wonders hidden in Your Word.” Oh yes Blessed God. I want so much more. Of You. Your Truth. Your promises.

Use me this day. Exactly as You know is best.

Oh look! The same verse in the Amplified Bible. “Open my eyes [to spiritual Truth] so that I may behold Wonderful things from Your law.”

And here, Contemporary English Version. “Open my mind and let me discover the wonders of Your Law.” Oh yes Lord. Yes!

Oh, now The Message. Verses 19 and 20. “I’m a stranger in these parts; give me clear directions. My soul is starved and hungry, ravenous! - insatiable for your nourishing commands.”

Yes Lord. The more I read, the more I want. Of You!

The Passion Translation says, “My life on earth is so brief, so tutor me in the ways of Your wisdom. I am continually consumed by these irresistible longings, these cravings to obey Your every commandment!”

And The Living Bible. “I am but a pilgrim here on earth; how I need a map - and Your commands are my chart and guide. I long for Your instructions more than I can tell.”

Amen to it all Blessed God. I love You. I need You. I want You. And I ask it all in Your Son’s most blessed name.

Use me. Thank You. Amen.

(635 words ~ 8:17 a.m.)