Jesus bids me, "Come."

Monday, April 21, 2014 (6:37 a.m.)

(8:46 a.m.)

Okay. I'm ready. Well, how about willing? You make me able. Please?

Hi God,

I'm feeling emotionally out of sorts. WAY emotionally our of sorts!

Yes! Let's call it as it really is. There's been extreme fear, balanced by an intentional faith. Sadness countered by joy. Physical inactivity beaten by the decision to take just a few steps.

You God are good. I know that. I believe it. I trust it. It's me that I doubt. Over and over again.

For hours already this morning I've thought of You. How best to approach You. Waiting around to clean up my thought process before coming to You. And now I just want to be here. Warts and all.

Thank You for that. Thank You that I don't have to be right, think straight

(9:16 a.m.)

Thank You that through this whole process of emotions, the One constant has been the knowledge that Jesus bids me, “Come.”

I've experienced it over and over already this morning. Again and again. Different songs singing. Beginning with the Hillsong Live arrangement of ♫It Is Well With My Soul♫

Recognizing ♫Oh trump of the angel!♫ as being associated with this dear to me hymn, I felt anything but my soul being well and would stop myself short of singing it out. Talk about stubborn! Mulish. Thank You that You are SO much bigger than my own pigheadedness!

Being willing to come to You. To look further into the lyrics. I find I don't have to pretend to be somewhere [peaceful and well] that I am not. I just have to be willing to trust You to do for me that which I cannot do for myself.

♫Oh trump of the Angel! Oh voice of the Lord! Blessed hope Blessed rest of my soul! It is well with my soul It is well It is well with my soul YOU are the Rock On which I stand By YOUR grace it is well My hope is sure In Christ my Savior It is well with my soul♫

THAT [Your grace!] is why it is well! Not anything I can manufacture. Even though You have taught me to say "It is well", I still have to come to believe it!

What a joy and a blessing to find in the search for other hymns mentioning “Come” that there are so many more than I could ever imagine. Even one describing me to a T!

♫Come, Ye Disconsolate♫ Disconsolate? Yeah. Me. This morning. “sad, unhappy, downcast...”

Perfect! ♫Come... here bring your wounded hearts, here tell your anguish; Earth has no sorrow that heav'n cannot heal.♫

Yeah. And a verse to bring it home! Hebrews 4:16.

Although there are many beautifully worded translations to this verse, I'm choosing the simplicity of The Message. “So let's walk right up to Him and get what He is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help.”

Rather than continue beating myself up for not being able to think and say and do and be all that I truly want, instead I am merely willing to “Come.” How I pray that this morning that is enough. I love You Jesus. I thank You for bidding me “Come.”

I'm here. I've come. Do in and through, by and for me exactly as You wish. You make me ready, willing and able and I'll say “thank You” in the process. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(575 words ~ 10:09 a.m.)