confessing disappointment

Wednesday, June 9, 2021 (7:58 a.m.)

Tahoe Vista, CA

Great, Glorious, Good, Gracious God,

Sometimes I forget to acknowledge You. Forgive me Lord. Negativity comes so readily. Easily. Thank You that turning our thoughts to You offers Truth.

(8:52 a.m.)

Blessed, Holy Father God, I’m confessing embarrassment to You right now. I am feeling quite self-critical and judgmental at the moment. 

Boo-hoo, our trip has not gone as planned. Weather and other circumstances completely beyond our control have me wanting other than I’ve been given. And my overwhelming self-critique is, “How dare you complain!”

While I am aware of the blessings You provide us Lord, I feel guilty and ashamed for wanting different than You’ve given us. I look to You, humbly asking You to remove my shortcomings (Step 7 of 12).

Thank You Father for allowing me to be this honest with You. I get to choose to counter every “you’ve got your nerve” self-criticism with further confession of my own character flaws. Praise You God.

I don’t have to hide my deepest self from You. I couldn’t even if I wanted to. Which I don’t. You know my deepest desire. Thank You that I get to bring them all to You.

Choosing to read about how to deal with disappointment I find two helpful phrases:

“courageously navigate disappointment by being desperately honest with the Lord” 

“Misplaced hope ultimately leads to disappointment. Assessing that disappointment can be a starting point in readjusting our expectations about the things we want in life.”

While I don’t see myself being the least bit courageous here, I am being desperately honest with You. I want forgiveness for seeing myself as a self-absorbed, spoiled brat.

I’m not the only one being impacted by change in weather. Some are severely so. Lord God, there truly is a battle going on in my mind. Knowing, trusting, believing and wanting Your Truth versus negatively comparing myself with how I reluctantly accept disappointment.

Again I say, thank and praise You Lord! I get to come to You with the worst of myself and Your Truth still sings within. ♪Great Is Thy Faithfulness♪ (Lamentations 3:23). And ♪My Life [strength, hope] Is In You♪

And just like that! ♪This IS The Day That The Lord Has Made♪ (Psalm 118:24) starts in. I WILL rejoice and be glad in it! Yes Lord.

Before that thought even finishes ♪You delight in showing mercy Mercy triumphs over judgment♪ begins. Lord God, how I thank You for the privilege of being desperately honest with You.

I confessed disappointment and You countered with Truth. Mercy. Well placed hope. Use us this day Lord. Exactly as You know is best. Hoping in You! Thank You. Praise You. Amen.

(458 words ~ 10:10 a.m.)