a gift of laughter

Saturday, February 2, 2019 (5:26 a.m.)

Holy God,

Good morning.

(6:57 a.m.)

And thank You.

I got to read Your Word. And go back to sleep. Warm. Dry. Safe. Sound. Thank You Father.

Let me be honest Dearest Lord. There’s an overwhelming part of me that is feeling tremendously guilty. And I am struggling to figure out if this is true or false guilt.

While I am so incredibly grateful for all the blessings You provide, what about the people who are cold and wet right now? Here I have the nerve to be rejoicing about the recent gift of laughter (Psalm 100:2 The Message) I have been experiencing lately, while others are shivering and trying to stay warm.

Holy God, speak to me here. I love You. I long to do Your will. Yet I sit. Safe. Warm. Dry. Not giving of myself. Or my resources. Is it sin that I am aware of the needs of others and do little to nothing to meet them?

I confess Father I am at a loss. I truly don’t know which way to turn in Your Word. Is satan distracting me from praising You? Or is The Holy Spirit directing me to do more than just pray Your blessing and keeping of others (1 Thessalonians 5:19)?

(1:49 p.m.)

All these hours later and I’m still in my head. I love You so much. I go back and forth between being incredibly grateful and feeling tremendously guilty for being warm and dry. Safe. And sound.

Holy God, I am going out on a limb here. Not wanting to be the least bit insensitive. Rather than staying locked in perceived guilt, I choose to praise You as I had originally intended.

Father, You are good. You are holy. You are kind. And I depend on You to do all You must for the benefit of others. Should You want me to do more than pray, I call on You to guide and direct me into action.

Until then I will continue to praise and thank You. “Always be joyful. Keep on praying. No matter what happens, always be thankful, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).

Back and forth. Hope. Then concern. Rejoicing. Followed by sadness.

And then back to where I started. Psalm 100 A psalm of thanksgiving. “On your feet now - applaud GOD! Bring a gift of laughter, sing yourselves into His presence” (vs. 1-2).

Yes God. I do applaud You! A gift of laughter is what originally brought me here much earlier this morning. These past few days I have been extremely aware of my willingness and ability to laugh. Readily being joyful. Genuine gifts from You.

“100:1-5 We always have reasons to rejoice. We live in God’s presence, under His continual care, and we experience His love each day. Each time we come into His presence, our heart should be filled with gratitude and praise. God never stops showering us with His love, He always keeps His promise to help us when we call on Him” (The Life Recovery Bible comment).

It’s on behalf of others for whom I call on You now Blessed God. Asking, seeking, knocking (Matthew 7:7). Depending on Your provision and care. Guide and direct me in what You would have me do for others Lord.

I love You. I thank You. Amen.

(573 words ~ 5:02 p.m.)