first and foremost

Wednesday, September 17, 2014 (6:11 a.m.)

Amazing GOD,

I look to You. Lean into You. Learn from You. Desire You. I think, wonder, fear, remember and start all over again.

Blessed Being. Father, Son, Holy Spirit, my mind is racing. There is much to accomplish. Many things to put into order. Time spent with You is the first and foremost.

Hmm, how do I keep You first and foremost in my day? My life? My thinking? My time? By remembering that it all comes from You anyway. None of it is mine. It's all Yours. Let me learn to approach it all from Your best for us.

How I thank You for the opportunity and privilege of spending time with You. You are good. Kind. Loving. Faithful. And this morning I don't even know what I'm to do with these truths.

Wow, You're good! I turn to You with my jumbled thoughts and You remind that first and foremost is You.

Words like: peace, love, joy, river, ocean, fountain; faith, hope and love again wrap themselves within me. Each wanting its due. My head can't match all the thoughts together. So I set them aside and confess it to You.

The next thing I know I'm reading 1 Corinthians 10:23-24 in The Message. “Looking at it [warnings against idolatry] one way, you could say, 'Anything goes. Because of God's immense generosity and grace, we don't have to dissect and scrutinize every action to see if it will pass muster.' But the point is not to just get by. We want to live well, but our foremost efforts should be to help others live well.”

Blessed GOD, yes! “Help others live well.” It has been my heart's desire for as long as I can remember. Help others live and LOVE well. Work in me to that end. As I seek to glorify and enjoy You forever, make it attractive and enticing to others.

I love You. I need You. I want You. And I ask You to do in and through, with and for me all that You know is best. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(356 words ~ 7:50 a.m.) 

grateful

Tuesday, September 16, 2014 (7:50 a.m.)

Holy, holy GOD,

I am grateful. Wonderfully, lovingly grateful.

I confess, I don't always recognize the gratitude. Oh but it's here. It really, truly is here.

You bless us. You keep us. You smile on us and are gracious to us. You show us Your favor and You give us Your peace (Numbers 6:24-26). All this I don't always see. I'm not always fully aware of it. But You are constant. Unwavering. Unswerving. Faithful. Solid. One standard. One.

Mm. When I allow myself to remember and believe it, there is peace. Profound peace. I can all too easily work myself up into a frenzy. Too often I fret. Stew. Worry. Become overly concerned. It's only when I remember that You really, truly ARE in control and that You absolutely do not change (Malachi 3:6) that I breath in deeply and trust You to be the God You claim to be.

And for this I am grateful. Wonderfully, profoundly grateful.

Blessed GOD, let me use this gratitude well. Do all You must to let it be seen by those I encounter this day. I love You. I need You. I want You. And I thank You. Oh, how I thank You. Use me well I pray. Use me well. Amen.

(215 words ~ 9:05 a.m.)

inhale life; exhale death

Monday, September 15, 2014 (6:51 a.m.)

Holy GOD,

Hmm... Deep cleansing breath. My brain is once again scattered.

(7:20 a.m.)

One thought leads to another and the next thing I know I'm looking up all kinds of things, except Scripture. Focus me please.

Yesterday I spent a good amount of time reading in Hebrews and contemplating faith. There truly is so very much about so many things that I absolutely do not know.

Grab my heart. Guide my soul. Lead my thoughts. Build my strength (Mark 12:30).

Mm... another deep cleansing breath. Yes GOD, center me. Remind me to breathe You in deeply, exhaling all toxicities. Mm, yes. Let me inhale life and exhale death!

Be in me. With me. By me. For me. Yes. 'If You be for me, who can be against me?' (Romans 8:31).

There is so much in Your Word for me to live. Instill it in me as You must that I will live as You would have me live. I love You. I need You. I want You. And I thank You. Yes. Yes. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(187 words ~ 7:51 a.m.)

cloud / crowd

Saturday, September 13, 2014 (5:26 a.m.)

Holy, Gracious, Loving GOD,

Thank You.

This morning I am highly emotional. I didn't expect to be. The tears are streaming and my heart is full. Thank You.

Thank You for random acts of kindness. Thank You for surprises by others. Thank You for the unexpected.

You placed me in a family that loves one another. Maybe not particularly well, but love all the same. Love that stems from You. Thank You.

Thank You for a cousin who has a huge heart for photography and the restoration of old photos. Thank you for his genuine desire to share them with others. Thank You especially for the certain one he posted recently depicting four generations of our family.

Blessed GOD, I can't even think of it without welling up. Thank You for this kind of emotion! For so very long I had walled myself off from feeling anything. Refusing [unable/unwilling?] to care about most things.

Once again I am hopeful. Caring. Kind [I hope/pray]. And pensive.

On this particular Saturday, this day of all days, I am especially grateful to You. On this very date, five years ago, You saved my brother. From himself. From the demons that run rampant in our family. The demons that are not seen in the above mentioned photo. And I have been so very blessed in the process.

Thank You that it is Your love that has surrounded us every step of our life together. The good times. The bad. The scary. The sad. You've been here through it all with us. Often times more noticeable than others. But here. With us. Nonetheless. Thank You.

Back to my reaction upon seeing this particular photo of people I recognize mostly through other snapshots. A great-grandfather, dearly loved my his namesake. A grandma and grandpa I never really knew. Their youngest son. A favored aunt and her first born. Our very own cloud/crowd of witnesses (Hebrews 12:1).

That was my first thought upon seeing it last night. I truly have thought this for years. But seeing this image of ancestors gathered together over sixty years ago caught me off guard. I wasn't ready. Not prepared. Oh, but how I thank You.

Thank You for the perfect reminder that we do have a cloud/crowd of witnesses surrounding us. Quoting The Message here. Hebrews 12, verses 1-3 begin under the title “Discipline in a Long-Distance Race”. Mm. Yes. Discipline. Please.

“Do you see what this means – all these pioneers who blazed the way, all these veterans cheering us on? It means we'd better get on with it. Strip down, start running – and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we're in. Study how He did it. Because He never lost sight of where He was headed – that exhilarating finish in and with God – He could put up with anything along the way; Cross, shame, whatever. And now He's there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item. That long litany of hostility He plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls!”

Mm. Yes. God shoot adrenaline into my soul that I would finish well this race that You've set before me. Here come the tears again. Help me use them well this day. To Your good and to Your glory. I love You. I want You. I need You. And I thank You. Amen.

(598 words ~ 6:43 a.m.)

scatteredness

Friday, September 12, 2014 (7:56 a.m.)

Dazed. Stupefied. Stunned. Swirling. Unsettled.

These words just begin to describe the scatteredness with which I approach You this morning. Forgive me. There are lots of emotions that won't quiet down. Thoughts that randomly jump from one thing to another.

Yes. Scatteredness sums it up. I have items scattered in every room. The backyard as well. It's as though I look around me and see the mess that's inside my head strewn about.

purified souls

Thursday, September 11, 2014 (6:55 a.m.)

Holy, Holy, Holy GOD,

I love You. I trust You. I need You.

temper my temperament?

Wednesday, September 10, 2014 (6:58 a.m.)

Waking up. It's not getting any easier. I keep thinking, “Today will be the day I spring out of bed. Eager. Excited.” Again I put it off. Drag my feet. Hold back.

Blessed Being,

I'm here. In body. Not so much in spirit. Change my temperament. Temper my temperament?

1 Peter 1:22

Simply GOD

Sunday, September 7, 2014 (8:32 a.m.)

GOD,

Simply GOD.

How many times have we spoken of the myriad of ways I tend to complicate things? Thinking. Rethinking. Overthinking. Thinking again.

That's what I've been doing this morning. In wanting to come up with the perfect term to encompass the holy Triune Godhead that You [plural] are, I was stalled.

How many years [decades, actually] have I used the phrase, “Thank You God” in expressing joy? While always thinking I was somehow disregarding Jesus and the Holy Spirit in the process.

I have no easy solution. No new word to coin for society. I read. I search. I study. I seek. And what I come back to is GOD. GOD, the Father. GOD, the Son. GOD, the Holy Spirit. GOD. Simply GOD.

♫GOD in three Persons, blessed Trinity!♫

I am beginning to think in thoughts of Three. It began the other day on my search for Paul's close to a letter. His second to the church at Corinth as it turned out. Grace, love and fellowship were his final words to them all.

Not grace, love or fellowship as the world would offer one another. No. “The grace of our Lord Jesus, Christ, the love of God [the Father], and the fellowship [intimate friendship] of the Holy Spirit” (2 Corinthians 13:13, or 14).

Thinking in Threes, I see three letters to the name GOD. Three letters in the recovery term of HOW to approach every day life. Honestly. Openly. Willingly.

As I continue my walk with You, I ask [oh look! Three more letters! Ask. Seek. Knock (Matthew 7:7).] that You, collectively - the Three of You, would help me “keep it simple”. Again, three words!

Awesome, Holy, Loving GOD. Keep me in such true AWE of You today that the Three of You show clearly through to all with whom I come in contact. I love You. I thank You. I worship AND adore You. Thank You for loving me first. Thank You for Your plan to USE me as You wish. Thank You. Thank You. Thank You! Amen.

(351 words ~ 9:06 a.m.)

Power Greater than myself

Saturday, September 6, 2014 (7:51 a.m.)

Holy Power Greater Than Myself,

Holy, Blessed, Mighty Power greater than myself. Talk with me please about what that title really means.

Philippians 2:13 is a corresponding Bible verse for Step Two in The Twelve Steps for Christians. Am I to spend time examining it? Or do we again take another look at grace and the glimpses You continue providing me? Guide me here I pray.

My thinking is a little skewed right now. Our phone service is disrupted. Messages currently unretrievable. There are many things to take care of before 11 o'clock. But this is truly where I'd rather be. Trusting and learning more from You.

Grace. “In the New Testament, God's grace is often set in contrast to law. While law demands that a human being perform perfectly to win God's approval, grace makes great promises of pardon and love” (Illustrated Bible Handbook).

As I read more of this description I am reminded that “'grace' describes decisive action taken by God on behalf of a mankind which is not merely weak but powerless without Him.” Is that not exactly what I am still coming to realize?

Even further down this section, life in You is again spelled out for me. “The Christian life is also a matter of grace. Because we live under grace rather than the law (Romans 6:14) we can experience righteousness. The power of sin has been drained and Christ, living in us, can act through us to make us truly good (cf. Galatians 2:20; Ephesians 2:8-10).

Thank You mighty, blessed holy Power that I get to so readily confer and confirm Your Truth!

As this Theology in Brief ends, again I read, “Grace is, as it is often defined, the 'unmerited favor of God.' But most importantly, it is God acting powerfully to do for you and for me all those things which we could never do for ourselves.”

Confessing my own powerlessness to various circumstances allows me to truly lean into and trust You to strengthen me with Your mighty power (Ephesians 6:10). There are so very many things I cannot do on my own.

Referring again to the above mentioned verse in Paul's letter to the believers in Philippi. “For God is working in you, giving you the desire to obey Him and the power to do what pleases Him.” Make it so Dearest Power. Make it so. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(406 words ~ 9:15 a.m.)

Mm

Friday, September 5, 2014 (7:57 a.m.)

♫Holy, Holy, Holy!

… God in three Persons, blessed Trinity!♫

Mm. Thank You. You take me to the most perfect places in Your Word. Just thinking of You as Three-in-One led me to singing the three Holies above. That in turn directed me to Revelation 4:8 and further up and over the pages to Jesus' message to the church in Laodicea (3:14-22).

Mm. Here again I get to take a deep breath. Relax. Remember. Be reminded of just Who is charge. Thank You.

Thank You that all I have is in You. Every single hope. Every blessing. Every challenge. Every fear. Thank You for redirecting my thinking every single time I need it.

Thank You for reminding me that every opportunity I have to love comes from You. A paragraph from a recovery devotional for this section of Scripture simply entitled Love tells us, “Jesus said: 'I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other' (John 13:34). Trying to love without first receiving God's love is like trying to water something with a hose that's disconnected from the faucet. When we receive God's unconditional love, we can begin to love ourself. We are told to love others as we love ourself and as Jesus has loved us. There is a boundless reservoir of love available to us; but without receiving the love of God in Christ, we will quickly run dry” (The Life Recovery Bible).

Thank You for another deep breath. Another opportunity to breath in Your Word. Another glimpse of grace. Mm. Yes. Thank You.

Use me this day to Your good and to Your glory. Be in, with, and completely around my every thought, word, deed and emotion. I love You and I long to love others as You would have me love myself. Make it so Blessed Hope. Make it so. Thank You. Amen.

(327 words ~ 9:00 a.m.)

AGOG!

Thursday, September 4, 2014 (10:23 a.m.)

Agog!

Eager. Excited. Avid.

How long has it been that I have TRULY felt passionate, enthusiastic, zealous, devoted, whole-hearted and earnest for You? Too long. Or maybe J-U-S-T long enough!

Blessed Father, Son and Holy Spirit, thank You. Thank You for indwelling and surrounding me. Thank You for leading, guiding and accompanying me throughout my day.

Thank You for allowing me to once again truly be “AGOG with God”!

AGOG here standing for Another Glimpse Of Grace with God. God, the Father. God, the Son. God, the Holy Spirit.

There is much to be accomplished. And great potential for using time well. Make it happen I pray. Guide, lead, direct, use me as You wish. Giving me just enough glimpses of Your grace to continue on Your path.

I love You. I thank You. I praise and worship You. Thank You for blessing me with Your presence. Thank You. Thank You. Amen!

(158 words ~ 10:36 a.m.)

However...

Thursday, September 4, 2014 (6:47 a.m.)

Divine Three-in-One,

Father. Son. Holy Ghost. Referenced by the apostle Paul in the close of his second letter to the church at Corinth and I'm still trying to get my head around the tiniest bit of understanding.

To say “I don't get it” is an understatement of the greatest magnitude. However, that doesn't keep me from hoping. Trusting. Studying. Seeking. Yes! Seeking “through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out” (Step Eleven of Twelve).

God, as I understand You, I love You. How I thank You for the opportunity to get to know and trust You and Your Word. Thank You that in The Twelve Steps for Christians, Step Eleven is accompanied by a verse written by the apostle Paul to the believers at Colosse. “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly (Colossians 3:16A)

Paul wrote his letter to the Colossians to “show us that Christ is the only real source of power in our life” (The Life Recovery Bible). I want that power. I need that power. According to everything I read I can have access to that power. It is to the divinity of Your Trinity that I look for that access.

It's no secret that I tend to complicate the easiest of things. If there is a way to misunderstand or misuse something, I'll find it. However, You are bigger than every single one of my mistakes. When I take my hands off and just let You be the God of my life, I am perfectly amazed by the grace with which things take place.

Since again coming across 2 Corinthians 13:13 (in some versions, verse 14) I continue getting to be reminded that it is “the grace (favor and spiritual blessing) of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the presence and fellowship (the communion and sharing together, and participation) in the Holy Spirit” (Amplified Bible) Paul prayed upon Your followers.

The Worldwide English version declares, “And to all of you I say, 'May the kindness and blessing of the Lord Jesus Christ be upon you. May God show you His love. May you all have the Holy Spirit with you.'”

The Message refers to “The amazing grace of the Master, Jesus Christ, the extravagant love of God, the intimate friendship of the Holy Spirit” and The Voice follows up with an explanation.

“Paul ends his letters as he begins them, praying that grace be with those who read this letter. From first to last, the life of faith is framed by grace.”

I haven't even begun to understand or fully experience life in this regard. However, I am excited to begin! Thank You. YOU have done this work in me. Keep it up I pray. Thank You. I love You. Oh how obvious I want it to be! Amen.

(500 words ~ 8:30 a.m.)

"with these last words"

Labor Day Monday, September 1, 2014 (7:51 a.m.)

Holy Three-in-One,

Gracious Jesus. Loving God. Present Holy Spirit. I read Your Word. I consider Your call on my life. I want to heed and obey Your best for me.

The apostle Paul urged the church at Corinth as “I close my letter with these last words: Rejoice. Change your ways. Encourage one another. Live in harmony and peace. Then the God of love and peace will be with you” (2 Corinthians 13:11 New Living Translation).

Trusting, believing, counting on Your grace, love and presence (v. 13) I look to various translations of Paul's words. “Aim at perfection. Listen to my appeal, be of one mind, live in peace...” (Illustrated Bible Handbook).

The Message, “Be cheerful. Keep things in good repair. Keep your spirits up. Think in harmony. Be agreeable.”

Worldwide English, “Be what you should be. Listen to what I say. Be good to each other. Agree with one another...”

The Voice, “keep rejoicing and repair whatever is broken. Encourage each other, think as one...”

Revised Standard Version, “Mend your ways...”

And just as I feel myself starting to think this is all on me to do. To change. To become. I read the slightest nuance between two different versions:

King James, “Be perfect, be of good comfort...”

and

American Standard, “Be perfected; be comforted...”

It's not on me to do the perfecting or the comforting. That's on the Three of You! Continue Your work in doing all You must to keep me out of Your way as You work YOUR will in my life.

As I prepare to go out into the day, let me take the whole of the Amplified Bible's translation with me.

“Finally, brethren, farewell (rejoice)! Be strengthened (perfected, completed, made what you ought to be); be encouraged and consoled and comforted; be of the same [agreeable] mind one with another; live in peace and [then] the God of love [Who is the Source of affection, goodwill, love, and benevolence toward men] and the Author and Promoter of peace will be with you.”

Work in me as You must. Grow me into the God fearing, Jesus loving, Holy Spirit dependent woman You would have me be.

I love You. I trust You. I ask, I seek, I knock (Matthew 7:7). Show me. Grow me. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(393 words ~ 9:09 a.m.)

August Starts and Stops

Sunday, August 24, 2014 (12:02 p.m.)

Bahia Point – San Diego, CA

Holy God,

Wow! What more can I say? Up. Out. Church. Here. Amazing. Yes. Y-O-U amaze me!

You give us opportunities. Favor. Bless.

Luke 1:27. (cf. Matthew 1:23; Mark 1:1; John 1:14)

Monday, August 25, 2014 (8:36 a.m.)

San Diego, CA

Blessed Father,

Thursday, August 28, 2014 (7:11 a.m.)

How many ways can I say, “I'm not okay!”?

WOW, God!

Even here You blow me away!

Thank You Father! Thank You for the tender ways with which You care for us. Ways of which we are often unaware.

For so many days I have come. Sat. Thought. Wondered. Tried. Started. Stopped. Started again. And through it all, You just wait.

John 14:27; John 16:33

Friday, August 29, 2014 (8:22 a.m.)

Sweet Jesus,

Loving Lord, Blessed Redeemer, Solid Rock. The list of Your attributes is endless. All I am not, You are. Thank You that through the fog of discontent You remain constant. I get to trust and believe in You. Every single time I remember to choose You.

Thank You Jesus. Thank You that I get to continue reading Your Word. Hoping for evidence of things we cannot yet see (Hebrews11:1).

Here is where I confess again to getting caught once more by disillusionment. Disappointment. Disheartenment.

I know I am supremely blessed. That is never in question. Squandering those blessings is my greatest concern.

Jesus, when I remember to look to You rather than the problems of the world around me I find hope. When You are the foundation on which we build (1 Corinthians 3:11) our footing will remain solid. Even as the trials and sorrows you said would take place on earth (John 16:33) present themselves we get to have peace in You.

The apostle Paul wrote to the church at Corinth encouraging Your followers to “Test yourselves to make sure you are solid in faith. Don't drift along taking everything for granted. Give yourselves regular checkups. You need firsthand evidence, not mere hearsay, that Jesus Christ is in you. Test it out. If you fail the test, do something about it” (2 Corinthians 13:5 The Message).

Jesus, I want desperately for my faith to be solid in You. I know however that it wavers. I waffle when adversities hit. The apple cart gets upended and I panic rather than staying solid in You.

Work in me. Work with me. Through me. For me. I love You. I want that above anything to show through. Louder than all else. Most evident. Please.

I love You. I want to stand solid in Your Word. On Your foundation. Make it so Dearest Lord. Make it so. Thank You. I Love You. Amen.

Sunday, August 31, 2014 (2:47 p.m.)

Anaheim ~ Tall Kitchen Table

Gracious Jesus,

  Loving Lord,

    Present Holy Spirit ~

I started off much earlier looking for the verse that describes Your attributes. Paul used it to close his second letter to the Corinthians. Chapter 13. Verse 13.

You know my heart. My needs. My desires. My limitations ~ whether self-imposed or not. I trust You. With all that I am. And all that I have. Do all that You must to make me all that You would have me become.

I love You. I believe You. Your Word. Your promises.

As I sit here. Alone. Quiet. Reflecting. Hoping. 2 Corinthians 13:11 is my prayer of request to You.

In writing to explain new life in Christ to the church at Corinth, Paul closed his letter “with these last words...”