fair

Thursday, September 30, 2010 (6:22 a.m.)

Blessed, Loving Lord,

Thank You. Thank You for this fairly early morning time alone with You.

(7:16 a.m.)

Lord, I am going to straight out confess to You that I feel like the biggest phony in the whole world. Every single time I come before You and then get sidetracked by something else (like checking health statistics on the internet) I judge myself harshly for being less adoring of You than You deserve.

You provide such wonder and awe. Joy. Fun. And I sit in judgment of myself. (And others!)

We went to the fair yesterday, Lord. You. Me. And this incredibly wonderful husband. I didn’t expect to have fun. I didn’t even really want to go. I listened to the opinion of another and thought we would be wasting our time. Once again I was proven wrong. Dead wrong!

I can’t remember having a better time. We were relaxed. It was fun. Every time I turned around there was another reason to think of and to thank You. I don’t remember our skies being bluer. It wasn’t too hot. Even when it clouded up and started to rain, great big heavy drops, we just went into another building and continued having fun. Fun at the fair. Fun at the fair that I didn’t even want to go to.

Lord, just how much do I miss out on in everyday living because I make up in my own mind what I think is true and base my decisions on faulty information? One person’s truth does not have to be my reality! How does this ever change Lord? How do I go from being this fearful, clingy woman to one of freedom and confidence? Only in You! Only through You!

It’s You that would lead me again to Paul’s letter to the Romans. But not just in any Bible. No. This morning in had to be in The Life Recovery Bible where I could again be reminded of these words, “For I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from His love. Death can’t, and life can’t. The angels won’t and all the powers of hell itself cannot keep God’s love away… nothing will ever be able to separate us from the love of God” (8:38-39).

I struggle Lord. I pull away from You because I feel so ashamed and unworthy. And then I get to read in the overview of this book that Paul explained four major points to the Romans in this book. “First, God makes no distinction between us as individuals – we are all guilty, and we are all offered His free gift of salvation (1:17-4:25). Second, we can all be freed from sin’s power through God’s grace and the Holy Spirit inside us (5:1-8:39). Third, we are all ‘in recovery’ and therefore have no grounds for arrogance (9:1-11:36). And fourth, because of God’s mercy we all must respect one another, despite the differences between us (12:1-15:13).” That’s some pretty tall orders Lord. Thank You that You never leave us alone in our execution of them.

Paul wrote, “Yes, all have sinned; all fall short of God’s glorious ideal;” (3:23) but he didn’t leave us there. No. He went on to say, “our acquittal is not based on our good deeds; it is based on what Christ has done and our faith in Him. So it is that we are saved by faith in Christ and not by the good things we do” (3:27-28).

And the reason I ended up in this book reminding me that I have been “Declared ‘Not Guilty’ ”? Because You are fair! “Entirely fair and just” according to verses 25 and 26. Blessed Lord God, I can never thank You enough for all You have done on my behalf. But I will continue trying! Thank You for all You are and all You do. You are wonderful and I am blessed to know You. Thank You Lord. I love You. Amen.

(668 words ~ 8:38 a.m.)

beauty

Wednesday, September 29, 2010 (7:50 a.m.)

Good morning Lord,

Good, beautiful morning! I think. I wonder. I fret. I stew. I worry. I waste. Yet still I seek. I read. I hunt. I look. And then I find. And smile. Ah yes Lord. Not just a face smile. A heart smile. A soul smile. A deep, lingering, peaceful all over smile that allows me to hope and rest securely in You. All this because, as the heading to Psalm 105 in The Learning Bible boldly proclaims, “The Lord Can Be Trusted”!

“Praise the Lord and pray in His name! Tell everyone what He has done. Sing praises to the Lord! Tell about His miracles. Celebrate and worship His holy name with all your heart. Trust the Lord and His mighty power.” (vs. 1-4)

I came to these verses as a cross-reference to “David’s Song of Praise” (1Chronicles 16:7-36) where I had actually gone to dwell and meditate on verse 27. “Give honor and praise to the Lord, whose power and beauty fill His holy temple.”

I read these words and am reminded that all You created works in concerted unison to proclaim Your majesty and beauty. Verses 30b-33a, “The world stands firm, never to be shaken. Tell the heavens and the earth to be glad and celebrate! And announce to the nations, ‘The Lord is King!’ Command the ocean to roar with all of its creatures and the fields to rejoice with all of their crops. Then every tree in the forest will sing joyful songs to the Lord.”

It is the beauty You created that draws me again and again away from myself and my own selfish interests to the truly something bigger and better that You have so perfectly provided.

Lord, how I ask that You will keep working in all of my heart, soul, mind and strength fashioning me into someone who will truly love You, others and myself as You have ordained (Mark 12:30-31).

♫For the beauty of the earth, for the glory of the skies, for the love which from our birth Over and around us lies; Lord of all, to Thee we raise This our hymn of grateful praise. For the beauty of each hour Of the day and of the night, Hill and vale, and tree and flower, Sun and moon, and stars of light; Lord of all, to Thee we raise This our hymn of grateful praise♫

Beauty, Lord. All around me. Open my eyes to see it and my heart to experience it. You are so good and I love You so much. Help me give You the honor and praise You so rightly deserve. I love You. Thank You. Amen.

(450 words ~ 9:03 a.m.)

pompous

Tuesday, September 28, 2010 (8:18 a.m.)

Sweetest, Blessed Lord,

I have been behaving badly. Selfish. Insecure. Bitter. Resentful. Pompous. Ouch! Isn’t that the very word I’ve been using this past week in fueling my annoyance of a loved one? Haven’t I gone so far in walling myself off from another’s behavior that I have become anything but loving myself?

Dearest, Blessed Father, forgive me for I have sinned! I have both thought and spoken disparaging things about this other because of my own hurt feelings. I have avoided coming to You because of this completely irrational sense of entitlement to these negative feelings and behaviors.

In berating myself for such negativity, I have only succeeded in once again giving the devil that foothold that Paul so accurately warned the Ephesians (4:27) against. The more I’ve tried to will myself to behave better, the more bitter and angry I’ve become. Forgive me Lord. I truly do know better!

Thank You for Your Word. Thank You for Your obedient people of ages past. They came before, willing to write Your truths for the rest of us to hold in our hands, encouraging us to follow Your will and Your way.

Thank You for the relative ease with which I found the words to the tune I began humming just a little bit ago. Michael W. Smith pegged it for the rest of us when he penned ♫Above all powers Above all kings Above all nature And all created things Above all wisdom And all the ways of man You were here Before the world began Above all kingdoms Above all thrones Above all wonders The world has ever known Above all wealth And treasures of the earth There’s no way to measure What You’re worth Crucified Laid behind a stone You lived to die Rejected and alone Like a rose Trampled on the ground You took the fall And thought of me Above all♫

No wonder I couldn’t come before You with such pompous feelings in my heart. I felt embarrassed and ashamed. I knew better, but I couldn’t do better ~ until I confessed to You my own inadequacy. I can’t do any of the things You ask of me without the strength that comes from Your mighty power (Ephesians 6:10). Thank You that You love me enough to forgive me every single time I attempt to branch out on my own and try to do ANYTHING for You by leaning on my own understanding (Proverbs 3:4-8).

Oh Dearest Lord, how I thank You for Your amazing grace in forgiving such a pompous wretch as me! You are wonderful. Holy. Mighty. Powerful. Loving. Perfect. And I’d much rather become more and more like You (2Corinthians 3:18b) than me any day of the week. Thank You for loving me enough to give me that very opportunity. I love You Lord. Amen.

(480 words ~ 9:32 a.m.)

HOME!

Monday, September 27, 2010 (11:06 a.m.)

Blessed, Beloved Lord

We’re home! Safe and sound ~ thanks to You and the good driving skills of this precious husband. What is home Lord? Is it truly where the heart is? What will Your Word have to say about it?

I’ll go with the direction of Deuteronomy 6 ~ “A Call to Love God”. Speak to me about this God. For almost two weeks (10 days to be exact) I have practically avoided You. Not You specifically ~ but the time set apart to be alone with You and Your Word. You provided me with ample beauty and genuine desire. What was it then that kept me thinking, “I’ll do it tomorrow. First thing tomorrow!” Oh the good intentions of my heart fall so far short in being executed.

So ~ back to this call to love You. I do! You know I do! All the whys and wherefores aren’t going to change that. You and I BOTH know You deserve far more than the “Oh, Hi God” s I’ve rather casually offered up to You these past ten days. Yes, there were genuine awe-filled moments where I stood in speechless reverence at the grandeur of Your creation. But even those don’t hold a candle to actually pulling out Your Word and communing intimately alone with You.

I DO take You for granted Lord! I don’t mean to. I try hard not to. The despicably bottom line is that I choose way too many things over You ~ TV, food, people, places, things… The list is endless. And where is it that I truly feel most at home? With You! Wherever I am ~ whenever I take the time to bring out a Bible with some sort of writing implement and pour my heart to You. Yes! Home IS where the heart is and my heart is ALWAYS with You. Even when it seems it isn’t, I know it is!

Forgive me once again Dearest Lord for my repeatedly feeble attempts to “catch up” with You in nature. No matter the flora or fauna ~ NOTHING takes the place of my just sitting alone with You, Your Word and writing my heart out to You. Thank You for again reminding me that there ARE NO shortcuts to You! You gave Your commandments (Deuteronomy 5:6-21) to Moses to remind Your people of the importance of guarding our allegiance to You. Just thinking about You is NOT the same as spending time alone with You. Even openly thanking and praising You is not giving You the proper place in our lives.

As much as I thank You Blessed Lord for bringing us safely back to our home, far more importantly is my thanks for again bringing me home to You! I love You so incredibly much Dearest Lord and I have truly, deeply, sincerely missed this time alone at HOME in my heart with You.

I love You Lord. Thank You. Amen.

(497 words ~ 12:18 p.m.)

resolution

Friday, September 17, 2010 (8:01 a.m.)

Merrill Campground Tent Site #76

Eagle Lake, CA 43.7˚

Blessed, Beloved Lord God ~

How do I even begin? Thank You is NOT enough! You have provided us safe travels, spectacular views, wonderful visits and quick resolutions to what few conflicts there have been. Take yesterday’s for instance ~ my jealousy over the reliance on the GPS rather than my own map reading capabilities? Oh Your Goodness Lord! THANK YOU for the rather swift identification and confession to such true triviality. Lord God, thank You for helping me to not only recognize the problem I was having, but to label it and work towards its resolution as well. Thank You Lord. Yes! Thank You!

Thank You for this husband that knows and understands my quirks and moodiness so well that he has learned when to offer help in my struggling and when to let me either work it out on my own and/or identify and have to ask for help when I need it.

Lord ~ You are so good! The two of us on this present trip are rapidly approaching the mark of our sixth decade on this earth. We’ve been traveling together for more than half of those, but never as gently and lovingly as this. It’s You Lord! You, here, in us. You, here, with us.

Three hundred fifty miles and seven hours of driving yesterday would have had disaster written all over it in the past. But Your work in softening our hearts toward You and each other turned every “Oops” and mistake into yet another adventure. Thank You Lord. Thank You!

We had no idea where we were going ~ had NEVER “been down this road before”. I was SO sure there would be “something better” up ahead. Thank You for my dear husband’s gracious acceptance of a lake experience nowhere NEAR our expectations. What a sweet, sweet sound has been in our ears and our hearts with the intense quiet broken only by the hoot of an owl somewhere off in the very early hours.

Thank You for this man’s good natured willingness to build fires and still bring me coffee just the way I like it ALL because You keep working RESOLUTION in our hearts and minds and souls. You are so good to us Lord and we are so very grateful. Help us serve You today as You would have us serve. We love You so much Dear Lord! Thank You. Amen.

(414 words ~ 8:44 a.m. 48˚)

unfinished Peacefulness and Rejoicing

Wednesday, September 15, 2010 (8:45 a.m.)

Room 272 Red Lion Inn ~ Eugene, OR

Blessed Lord,

♫Hallelujah Jesus… my Lord beautiful You are♫ Lord, after looking at the lyrics I don’t even know how to continue. There is such a spirit of calm and peacefulness that has washed over me by just reading ♫Keeper of the stars, Lord of time and space♫ I remember the excitement I felt in recognizing Evan Wickham at church and having him mention when it was that he wrote this to You.

Thursday, September 16, 2010 (7:12 a.m.)

Room 272 Red Lion Inn ~ Eugene, OR

This seems to be quite conflicting! On the one hand I’m giving You part of my attention and on the other, I’m practically cursing the delay of the free internet connection. There is NO peacefulness in the way I began approaching You just now!

Lord, I confess to planning to multitask a birthday greeting to the eighteen year old while throwing a few thanks and praises Your way. NOT at all the way to approach the Creator of the Universe! And even in confessing the dual-mindedness…

Tuesday, September 28, 2010 (10:37 a.m.)

Here I am at home, working to bring the ‘AGOG blog’ up to date and again I am reminded as to just how often it is that I take for granted time spent alone with You. Lord God, how I count on You to be here for me. Yet far too many times I let life get in the way of true praise and worship with You. Thank You for loving me anyway – in spite of all my foibles.

While we’re here at the business of catching up, let me enter an unfinished time of “Rejoicing” from last month.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010 (8:33 a.m. CDT)

Room 600 Drury Inn Birmingham, AL

Most Holy God,

Where do I even start? With thanks and praises of course! Thank You Lord for safe travels and a loving ♫Mother and Child Reunion♫ Yes Lord. How blessed are we to be able to come enjoy our beloved son’s neck of the woods: doing simple things like sharing a snack, going grocery shopping and stopping for ice cream. Mm. Yes Lord. I love being able to come before You with my heart rejoicing over simple pleasures. Thank You for this blessed husband that makes and brings me coffee in the morning and then leaves me alone to pray while he goes down to get us breakfast.

As I turn in the Psalms this morning Lord I ask You to add Your understanding to this translation as I struggle with my decision of bringing the more compact New King James Version over my much heavier and favored Bibles.

Blessed Lord, how I love rejoicing with You in Your Word! I begin reading Psalm 19. I get excited about the heavens declaring Your glory and the firmament showing Your handiwork…

*And then the much loved husband returned with breakfast and another prayer went unfinished.

(500 words ~ 11:11 a.m. PDT 9/28/10)

fellowship

Monday, September 13, 2010 (6:03 a.m.)

Folsom, CA - Anthony’s Living Room

Blessed Lord,

Thank You! Thank You for our safe travels yesterday. Thank You for an extremely loving atmosphere throughout the drive. Thank You for a true sense of community between my traveling [and marital J] partner and myself. Thank You Lord for a genuine feeling of camaraderie.

Yesterday Lord I had asked You if we could speak this morning about fellowship. My first thought just earlier was again about that very thing. And just like that ~ SNAP! I’m in tears. Not just any tears mind You. Deep, profound, loving tears marking the first anniversary of a time well spent in true fellowship with my brother, one year ago today.

You, Lord, are fully responsible for the love that transpired that day ~ the love of a daughter for her dad, a sister for her brother and yes Lord, even of a man for himself. Thank You Lord. There are not enough “Thank You” s in the world with which to express the heartfelt gratitude I have for You of giving me this past year of fellowship with my brother.

Thank You ♫is NOT enough to show I care… (Eight days a week… I love you…)♫

Most Beloved and Loving God, as we begin to pack up this morning and continue on our journey, Lord how I ask that YOU would be our Guide. Make us keenly aware of the many things You have for us to know and do.

Even as I pray this, my mind keeps jumping ahead to the very ending of what has become known as Paul’s second letter to the Corinthians. Blessed Lord, as I turn to things to read today, would You please make this particular book my go to resource? Make it come as alive to me later as it is right now. Provide for me YOUR ability to fully live Paul’s closing words to the church at Corinth. “May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all” (2 Corinthians 13:14). Oh yes Dearest Lord. Make it so.

I love You. Thank You. Amen.

(366 words ~ 7:08 a.m.)

community

Sunday, September 12, 2010 (7:35 a.m.)

Our Father ~

♫Our God♫ Lord, will You talk to me this morning about community? Being inclusive?

So often I speak of You as MINE ~ separate. Alone. All by myself. I don’t think that’s the way You designed us. In fact ~ I’m sure it isn’t! Genesis 2:18, “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’.”

Isaac prayed a blessing of community over Jacob, “May God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and increase your numbers until you become a community of peoples” (Genesis 28:3). Blessed God, You Yourself changed Jacob’s name to Israel (Genesis 35:10) before announcing to him, “I am God Almighty; be fruitful and increase in number. A nation and a community of nations will come from you and kings will come from your body.” (v.11)

In preparing to bless Joseph’s sons Manasseh and Ephraim, “Jacob said to Joseph, ‘God Almighty appeared to me at Luz in the land of Canaan, and there He blessed me’” (Genesis 48:3) He went on to repeat Your blessing of making him fruitful with an increase of numbers and making him a community of peoples.

With You Yourself commanding community I know it’s not something I should ignore. Lord, I’ve watched You work in my life, changing me in so many ways. Tomorrow do You think we can talk about ‘fellowship’? I love You.

(244 words ~ 8:30 a.m.)

remember

Saturday, September 11, 2010 (7:17 a.m.)

Blessed Lord,

It’s that date we will always remember. I’ve already seen a photo of what took place in New York nine years ago. Thank You that whatever it was that I had planned to say to You this morning completely lost it’s precedence. There are far too many things, of much greater importance to remember.

Lord, it would be much too easy to focus on the disaster of it all. The sadness. The loss. I choose instead to remember Your faithfulness. I remember being filled with hope as our nation’s leaders stood together – political lines blurred for that brief moment – on the steps of the Capitol building singing out to You!

♫God Bless America, Land that I love. Stand beside her and guide her Through the night with a light from above. From the mountains, to the prairies, To the oceans white with foam God bless America, My home sweet home.♫

Blessed Lord how I thank You for turning my heart and attention to First Thessalonians this morning. I started again on the same page that was marked from another time with You. This morning with 3:6, “And now Timothy has just returned and brings the welcome news that your faith and love are as strong as ever and that you remember our visit with joy and want to see us just as much as we want to see you.”

Because of this glad news, Paul was buoyed through his own tough times. Throughout this letter, he reminds his readers that You, Dear God, are our one true source of hope. Thank You Lord for helping us to remember that as well.

My heart just started humming and it took a while for me to find the words with which to accurately sing ♫My life is in You, Lord, My strength is in You, Lord My hope is in You, Lord In You, It’s in You… I will praise You with all of my life I will praise You with all of my strength With all of my life, with all of my strength All of my hope is in You In You, it’s in You…♫ Blessed Lord, please help the people of this nation remember that all our hope is in YOU!

Turning to the explanation of Paul’s letter I read that his purpose in writing it was “To commend the believers in Thessalonica for their trust in God, to encourage them to continue trusting Him, and to reassure them that Christ would return.” In this particular book’s introduction it says, “Many people who had worshiped idols turned their lives over to God, and for this Paul commended them. The believers in Thessalonica had gone from a life of dependency upon material things and empty ritual to a life of serving the living and true God.”

It is in reading Your Word this morning Lord that I again profoundly remember Your faithfulness, Your love for Your people. Let us remember these things today Lord. Not just the horror and devastation, but the cross of steel beams that was found standing in the wreckage.

Let us become a people who TRULY puts our lives, our strength and our hope deeply and securely in You! Thank You most blessed Lord. I love You. Amen.

(548 words ~ 8:42 a.m.)

Beloved

Friday, September 10, 2010 (4:28 a.m.)

Blessed Beloved Loving Lord God,

Hmm. Beloved. Much loved. Prized. Dearest. Cherished. Treasured. Esteemed. Revered. Worshiped. Adored.

(8:22 a.m.)

Again Lord,

Let me begin again. I love You. Much earlier this morning, I couldn’t get passed the idea that all the verses I found referenced in Your Word for ‘beloved’ did NOT include Your people referring to You as ‘Beloved’.

There are many verses of You describing Your people, especially Your Son, as beloved. Song of Solomon alone has more than a dozen entries of the two lovers using this descriptive word for one another.

When we first began our time together today, I was looking for a confirming verse that “Beloved” was indeed an appropriate word used to describe You. In not finding it, I came on back to bed. Now I’m even more confused.

Prior to leaving here just before daybreak, my heart and soul and mind started singing a resounding rendition of ♫Let the redeemed of the Lord say so… I’m redeemed I’m redeemed Praise the Lord♫ Immediately upon awakening just now the musical genre has completely changed and the tune is now The Beatles' “Eight Days A Week”.

The cool thing is Lord, in substituting one VITAL Word, the song completely fits my feelings for You! ♫Ooh I need Your love Lord, Guess You know it’s true. Hope You need my love Lord, Just like I need You. Hold me, love me, hold me, love me, Ain’t got nothin’ but love Lord, Eight days a week.♫

Never are the words I choose to express my feelings toward You ever meant to be the least bit careless or disrespectful. But just look at the truth these next few phrases hold! ♫Love You ev’ry day Lord, Always on my mind. One thing I can say Lord, Love You all the time. Hold me, love me, hold me, love me. Ain’t got nothin’ but love Lord, Eight days a week.♫ Just because it’s corny, doesn’t make it not true!

♫Eight days a week I love You. Eight days a week Is not enough to show I care. Ooh I need Your love Lord! Eight days a week!♫

Beloved Lord, thank You for loving me so much that You sent Your own Beloved Son (John 3:16) to suffer and die in my place giving me the honor and the privilege of loving You "eight days a week". I do Lord! I absolutely do. Thank You. Amen.

(410 words ~ 9:09 a.m.)

Lord

Thursday, September 9, 2010 (4:59 a.m.)

Loving Lord,

Good early morning. Thank You for sleep and rest and waking up in time to go watch children for loved ones. Lord, thank You for the fun and imaginations of these same children from yesterday. Thank You for a successful cataract removal of their aunt.

Beloved Lord, there’s a trip coming up and a brother already on one. Plus there was some very sad news of an older friend of a friend minding his own business while walking in a seemingly safe neighbor and getting beaten up.

All kinds of happenings, Lord, and again I thank You that I get to come before You with them. Lord, You are so good, so kind. Oh! And Lord. Thank You ESPECIALLY for the shared thoughts of a nine year old last evening as he proclaimed that he thinks his mom and dad need to start taking he and his brother and sister to church. I don’t know where that came from Lord, but as I prepare to go over there right now [with oatmeal pancake mix at the ready J] how I ask for YOUR words to further the conversation.

We had fun together yesterday Lord. All of us. This morning I ask for Your power and strength to do it all over again. I love You so much Dearest Lord. Thank You for some time together before I have to go. You alone made it possible for me to be here with You (1 Corinthians 1:30). And even as I look to find a scripture using “God alone”, I know to take The Learning Bible with me this morning. Heavy as it is. It’s perfect for this particular nine year old.

Thank You Lord. Speak to me more throughout this day about Your power and wisdom. You Lord came “to save us and to make us wise, acceptable and holy.” I could use a LOT of You today Lord. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(331 words ~ 5:31 a.m.)

attributes

Wednesday, September 8, 2010 (7:05 a.m.)

Awesome God,

Blessed Lord. Superior Being. There are far too many adjectives with which to even begin describing Your attributes. Right now I’m stuck with a song heard on the radio yesterday while driving on our way to lunch with precious friends. Lord, how wonderful it is to me when I hear something, am able to find it easily and still associate its message back to You.

♫I’m Yours♫ (Jason Mraz) is that song for me this morning! It’s light and cheery. The much-loved husband and I are still humming it, with smiles on our faces and hearts. Psalm 8 gives me a link to the stretch I’ve again taken while quite readily singing Your praises.

The Bible Handbook refers to this psalm thusly, “How awesome God is, whose greatness is shown in creation, and who stoops to care for man!” WOW, God! How wonderfully You provide for us! Thank You.

Psalm 8 was used by Debbie and Michael W. Smith to pen their praise song ♫How Majestic Is Your Name♫ They, too, saw this as such “an expression of joy from a man (King David) who understood the majesty of creation… and that God had entrusted man to rule over it! Furthermore, the psalmist affirms our worth in this psalm. No room for poor self-image here!”

The Life Recovery Bible speaks in its notes to this low self-esteem theme as well. “We see here that God has made us to be fantastic beings with great powers and privileges. We should never sell ourselves short. Our self-esteem should be based on what God thinks of us – not what others say about us.”

Ah, [-some J] God! You are just so incredibly good. Shifting over to a devotional reading entitled “Self-perception” I again read that ‘our ability to see ourself as we truly are in God’s eyes was probably warped.’ “God wants us to realize how precious we are to Him and to begin to see ourself in the light of His love.”

Thank You Lord for providing me with yet another catchy tune that helped me dig deeper into Your Word and be able to affirm once again just how very much You love even me.

I love You so very much Dearest Lord. And all I can add here is a happy little tune that helps me laugh and dance ♫So I won’t hesitate no more, no more It cannot wait, I’m sure There’s no need to complicate, our time is short This is our fate, I’m Yours♫ Ah, thank You God! I AM Yours! Amen.

(434 words ~ 8:45 a.m.)

forgiveness

Tuesday, September 7, 2010 (6:37 a.m.)

Awesome and Wonderful God,

Thank You! Talk to me this morning about forgiveness, would You please? I still have a long way to go with it. I had honestly forgotten how easily I could hold a grudge and just how detrimental that is to my health - physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Oh look at that! All the aspects of loving You – with all my heart, soul, mind and strength (Mark 12:30).

Lord, it is here that I must ask You to forgive me. I knew my feelings were hurt over something relatively minor. I also knew that I had stored it up and was occasionally taking it out to look at it, reminding myself of just how ‘right’ I was to continue feeling hurt. Oh, and I didn’t stop there! No, no. I got to the place where I started adding to it. Every slight. Every perceived indifference went straight into that gunnysack I was carrying around with me. [Interesting isn’t it that it was gunny sacks that Daddy used to use to bring home the stinkiest, smelliest fish from his fishing trips - all iced down to keep them fresh. The icier my tones and attitudes became the fresher the wound stayed!]

Forgive me Lord. There for a while I truly thought I was justified. Even when I repeatedly felt You urging me toward forgiveness, I would consider Your guidance then slip over to “But what about…?” I’m thinking this would be exactly why Paul encouraged his followers in Ephesus to live in unity. Ephesians 4:25-27, “So put away all falsehood and ‘tell your neighbor the truth’ (Zechariah 8:16) because we belong to each other. And ‘don’t sin by letting anger gain control over you.’ (Psalm 4:4) Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a mighty foothold to the devil.”

And it did! One thing so very quickly led to another. And the next thing I knew I had dug myself into a hole that I was becoming too embarrassed to crawl out of. Lord, thank You for Your guidance. It was Your persistent leading that helped me finally come clean and seek my friend’s forgiveness for grudge holding.

Your Word has great things to teach us about grudges as well. Leviticus 19:17-18, “Don’t hold grudges. On the other hand, it’s wrong not to correct someone who needs correcting. Stop being angry and don’t try to take revenge. I am the Lord, and I command you to love others as much as you love yourself.”

And then of course there is the wisdom of the Preacher/Teacher in Ecclesiastes 7:9, “Only fools get angry quickly and hold a grudge.”

Thank You Lord that You Word is filled with Your love, Your will, Your way and all we have to do is choose to follow You. Yes. It all comes right back to Deuteronomy 30:19-20, “This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to His voice and hold fast to Him. For the Lord is your life, and He will give you many years in the land He swore to give your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.”

Lord, I love You so much. Thank You that Your forgiveness includes every single time I give in to willful [actually WON’T-full J] stubborn disobedience and then finally come to YOUR senses. Thank You for NEVER giving up on me!

♫Oh no, You never let go Through the calm and through the storm Oh no, You never let go In every high and every low Oh no, You never let go Lord, You never let go of me♫ How blessed I am Lord, that You never let go! Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(660 words ~ 8: 03 a.m.)

♫Holy, Holy, Holy♫

Labor Day Monday, September 6, 2010 (4:04 a.m.)

Good really early morning Lord,

The clock said 3:33 and I’ve been singing ♫Holy, Holy, Holy♫ ever since. Coming out here and looking it up, at least now it makes sense! We sang it in church yesterday morning. ♫Open the eyes of my heart Lord… I want to see You… high and lifted up Shining in the light of Your glory Pour out Your power and love As we sing holy, holy, holy Holy, holy, holy… I want to see You♫

Wow Lord! What a thought! To actually see You? I see evidences of You constantly. There’s the beauty that surrounds us almost endlessly. I see You in the way we’ve changed by growing in You and Your Word. But to actually see You? ♫Shining in the light of Your glory♫? I don’t even know what that would be like!

Absolutely overwhelming. Completely awestruck. These are just a few of the thoughts that immediately come to mind. I’m going back to bed for awhile to meditate on the idea of truly having Your power and love poured out upon me.

It’s very early Lord and these thoughts are wonderfully profound. ♫Open the eyes of my heart Lord♫ especially as I prepare to again close the eyes of my body. I love You!

(7:24 a.m.)

Thank You Lord for a few more hours of sleep. Thank You that during that time of rest I continued contemplating what it would be like to have You ♫pour out Your power and love♫ and for us to sing ♫Holy, holy, holy♫

Lord, How I thank You for these thoughts. Thinking these things allowed me to get to a place of much needed awareness. An opening of the eyes of my heart if You will. I have slipped back over to a place of storing up hurt feelings. Rather than discussing them or better still, just letting them go, I’ve been harboring them. Holding on to occasionally take another look as to why I am justified to feel as I do.

Thank You God for giving me words to express myself. Non-judgmentally. Without malice or discontent. Just straightforward, matter-of-fact “My feelings were hurt when…”

Thank You Lord. Thank You that You love us so much that You always want Your best for us. Thank You that You have the patience to wait for us to want You too. Mm. Yes. Thank You Lord. I love You. Amen.

(410 words ~ 7:36 a.m.)

accident

Sunday, September 5, 2010 (6:43 a.m.)

Amazingly, Awesome God,

Thank You! There was a mistake made in the pool here yesterday that could have turned into a much bigger problem. It truly was an accident Lord. One of those things which ‘happens unexpectedly and unintentionally, typically resulting in damage or injury.’ Thankfully to You, the only damage or injury that seemed to have resulted was in the possible hurt or embarrassed feelings of a nine year old girl. Lord, this is where I come to You. I don’t take the potential of my having hurt another lightly.

I don’t know if I overreacted. I truly was scared to think of the ‘undesirable or possibly disastrous results’ that could have stemmed from the act of one fairly confident swimmer grabbing on to a less confident swimmer’s leg. I was right there. There was no real physical damage or injury. But what about emotional harm Lord? Did I go too far in my attempt to make the point for the importance of safety?

This morning my very first cohesive thoughts were to come here before You rejoicing in the fact that You had once again reminded me that my ‘job’ where water is concerned is in helping people learn to be safe in and near it.

I tend to get so excited in wanting others to learn to swim that I have once again forgotten the importance of teaching the safe water rescues that go along with it. Forgive me Lord.

As this final week of what has seemed to be a very short swim season comes to an end, help me teach the things You would have others know Dearest Lord.

I read Your Word and see where You had ‘safe towns’ set up for people to go who had accidentally caused a death. The Preacher/Teacher of Ecclesiastes (1:9) noted “Everything that happens has happened before; nothing is new, nothing under the sun.”

Lord, I am still so easily amazed when I turn to Your Word and see things that I am thinking or feeling that were already spelled out so many years before. Accidents have been happening since before the early pages of Your Word recorded them. I ask You Lord to grant me Your wisdom and grace to deal with them as they arise. And where water is concerned, to help others be better prepared to handle them when they do.

Lord, I love You so very much. Thank You for the time You take with me each and every day. Amen.

(424 words ~ 7:51 a.m.)

memories

Saturday, September 4, 2010 (7:05 a.m.)

Good Morning Lord,

I love You. Thank You. I’m smiling as I contemplate memories. Yesterday You provided us a wonderful opportunity to retrace many of our most precious memories beginning some 34 years ago. A favorite beach house, treasured friends and beautiful surroundings all led to a blessed afternoon of remembering. Thank You Lord. Thank You for the gift of memories.

This morning I find only two verses containing the word memories. They both challenge me to become more the woman You created me to be. Proverbs 10:7, “We all have happy memories of the godly, but the name of a wicked person rots away.” How very true Lord. I desperately long to become a person who evokes happy memories!

Paul’s first letter to the people of Thessalonica tells of Timothy’s visit to them in Paul’s place. “But Timothy has just now come to us from you and has brought good news about your faith and love. He has told us that you always have pleasant memories of us and that you long to see us just as we also long to see you.” (1 Thessalonians 3:6)

These are the people I want to emulate Lord. No Lord. Scratch that. On second (and even third, fourth, fifth…) thought, YOU are the person I want to be like! Thank You for providing us with their examples of being people filled with Your faith and love. These were people readily willing to suffer greatly for the privilege of following You.

According to The Bible Handbook, Paul knew these young believers were suffering persecution and strong opposition. His love for them was further demonstrated by his concern and sending Timothy in his place. He was filled with joy upon Timothy’s return with news of their steadfastness and affection for Paul.

As deeply as Paul loved these believers, he didn’t pray that their persecution would end. Instead he asked You “that their intimate relationship of love, so vital to growth in holiness, might ‘increase and overflow’ (vs. 12, 13)”.

Lord, continue Your work in me. I pray that I would not so much fear suffering but instead count it as a blessing. Thank You for the memories that You provide us Lord. Help us use them to continue building the lives You would have us live. I love You so much dearest Lord. Thank You. Amen.

(399 words ~ 8:12 a.m.)

haughty

Friday, September 3, 2010 (6:35 a.m.)

Oh Your Goodness Lord,

Oh Your great and glorious goodness! Thank You Lord! After all these years I have finally gotten another glimpse of understanding of the word haughty. To which I can only say, “Ouch!” L

Lord, I don’t like seeing myself in such an unflattering light. “Arrogantly superior and disdainful”. Oh dearest Lord, how very long have I so strongly resembled that word?

My first recollection of even wondering what it meant was upon reading it in my Life Recovery Bible fifteen years ago. After first receiving this edition of The Living Bible I remember wondering what in the world 1 Corinthians 13:5 meant by love is “never haughty”. Although I believed I had a good understanding of the end of the verse, “or selfish or rude” it wasn’t until this very morning upon awakening that the “Aha!” light bulb went on for me.

Lord, I feel so embarrassed and ashamed! This past week I have been revisiting my memories of myself as a much younger wife and mother. I had quite a few opinions, theories and especially rather harsh judgments concerning the women role models of my youth. My grandma, mom and mother-in-law come immediately to mind as I consider my haughtiness in planning (and fully expecting) to do SUCH a much better job at listening to and raising our children, being attentive to my husband, etc.

Let me sum it all up right here, right now. NOT! I didn’t know what I thought I knew Lord. I was haughty. No two ways about it. Even if by chance it didn’t show outwardly, I know very well in my heart of hearts that I was absolutely, positively, without a doubt haughty. Forgive me Lord. I could try to use my own immaturity or insecurity as an attempt of excusing myself, but the bottom line is that in working so hard to get myself up on a pedestal of my own making, I would have only been putting myself in a position to look down on another. Not at all what Paul described as love to the Corinthians in his first letter to them.

I want to be a loving person Lord. Not in comparison to anyone else. Not in any attempt to look so good to others. No Lord. I want to love You and others because that is what You created me to do. It is far more than obvious that I can’t do this by myself. But You, being the loving, perfect God that You are can do it in me and through me. Teach me to love Lord, as You would have me love. Purely. Genuinely. Freely.

I love You so much dearest Lord. Help me love others and myself as well. Thank You for another glimpse of grace. Your grace, Lord. I love You. Amen.

(476 words ~ 7:27 a.m.)

casual

Thursday, September 2, 2010 (7:59 a.m.)

Blessed Lord,

Well there went a whole hour and a half of “I just want to check for this one phone number. Oh yeah, what about this number? Let me look at the emails real quick. Oh, and facebook too…”

I rather be here with You Lord! I’d really MUCH rather be here with You! Forgive my casual approach to You. You gave Your life for me and I still haven’t gotten back to consistently giving You the first hour of my day. Hmm. Doesn’t look at all like full esteem and reverence of You from this vantage point. Whatever will You do with me Lord? How will You heighten my level of commitment to You?

I do love You so much. There is no doubt about that! I’m reading in Your Word about sin and gladly suffering in obedience to Your will and Your way (1Peter 4:1). I remember being very flip and irreverent when first presented with this truth several years ago.

Reading of others’ casual approach to Your grace and goodness, I wince at the similarity of Jeremiah’s (3:9) presentation of Your depiction of Judah’s casual behavior toward Your loving kindness. “She treated it all so lightly – to her it was nothing at all that she should worship idols made of wood and stone [or in this particular case ‘bits and microchips’! L]. And so the land was greatly polluted and defiled.”

Lord, it is never my conscious intent to slip over that fine line of obedience into disobedience. There are so many areas where I honestly can’t be trusted. Please Lord, continue Your work in me that I would learn to approach You, Your Word, Your will, Your way with the reverence that is so rightly deserved. Replace my irreverent casualness with full-on esteem and reverence. I love You so very much. I truly do. Thank You. Amen.

(320 words ~ 9:28 a.m.)

God-confidence

Wednesday, September 1, 2010 (6:50 a.m.)

Most amazing and awesome God,

Thank You that this morning I couldn’t wait to come out here with You. Thank You that again today I feel especially “AGOG With God”. Oh yea! And thank You!

Blessed God, thank You that yesterday I once again realized the degree to which I have been fueling myself with fear. Thank You Lord that I don’t have to live a moment being afraid of making mistakes. And yes. I know that just because I don’t have to, doesn’t mean that I won’t.

Awesome God, how I LOVE reading Your Word and getting so excited when I recognize myself in it! It’s like when Pastor Ed described how most people look for themselves in a photograph. Usually to see how they came out in it. Thank You Lord, that so very often I read Your Word to see how I am developing and to remind myself what good company I am in.

I sit here reading The Message and I grin as I take in the way Eugene Peterson has presented Paul’s words to the Corinthians. Chapter nine ends as he tells of the crown of laurels that was to be won at the end of a race back then. That kind of crown didn’t last forever and Paul said that he never ran without a goal. He didn’t box by beating his fists in the air. He wanted his readers to understand that the need to train and the desire to win applies to our spiritual lives as much as it does to athletic competitions.

Lord God, thank You for continually reminding me that all my hope and faith and trust HAS to be in You! Every single bit of strength I have ultimately comes from You. With that being the case, why would I want to waste a single ounce of it from being afraid of making a mistake?

Lord, how I ask You to keep me hoping, trusting, believing in You. You are so good. It’s only in and through You that I would ever read these next words that the apostle wrote to those Corinthians he referred to as friends. In what has now become chapter ten, he encouraged them to remember their history. He reminded them of the miracles their ancestors had witnessed when they “walked under the cloud and went through the sea” (v. 1) as they followed Moses “from enslaving death to salvation life” (v. 2).

Paul reminded and warned his dear friends that their predecessors had their “meals provided daily by God”. They all were able to eat and drink because of the spiritual food and drink You gave to them. The drink was from the Rock. And the Rock was Christ (3-4).

And this is where my resemblance comes in. Verse 5, “But just experiencing God’s wonder and grace didn’t seem to mean much – most of them were defeated by temptation during the hard times in the desert, and God was not pleased.” Too often I give into temptation Lord. I never trained as an athlete. I am prone to giving up easily. Running to win is a foreign concept to me. Quitting is what I have been good at through the years.

You are changing that quality in me. Thank You Lord. You are not going to leave me alone in the fear of my own making. I sit here reading Paul’s message, seeing myself. "We must never try to get Christ to serve us instead of us serving Him; they (the people who did shameful things) tried it and God launched an epidemic of poisonous snakes. We must be careful not to stir up discontent; discontent destroyed them"(9-10).

And here comes what got me to this book in the first place this morning. Verses 11 and 12, “These are all warning markers – danger! – in our history book, written down so that we don’t repeat their mistakes. Our positions in the story are parallel – they at the beginning, we at the end – and we are just as capable of messing it up as they were. Don’t be naïve and self-confident. You’re not exempt. You could fall flat on your face [And I have! J] as easily as anyone else. Forget about self-confidence; it’s useless. Cultivate God-confidence.”

Mm, yes Lord! God-confidence. As I am once again reminded of just how very small I am, thank You for the awesome comparison of just how very great You are. Thank You Lord. Thank You for bringing me here. Thank You for teaching me and guiding me. How I ask You to be with us this day as I prepare to possibly make mistakes if they need to be made. Transform me from this prison of fear and emotional paralysis into a person of action in and through You.

Any confidence I have HAS to come from You! Thank You so much dearest Lord for taking time with me this morning. I love You so very much. Thank You. Amen.

(840 words ~ 8:29 a.m.)