outward appearances

Thursday, February 27, 2014 (6:10 a.m.)

Hey Dad,

So I'm not at all sure just how comfortable I'm supposed to get with thinking of You as more my Dad than my Heavenly Father. It's a stretch. It takes work. But still I'm trying. Guide and direct me as You desire.

This morning I'm here to thank You for the gifts You have given us. Gifts of rest. A semblance of order. And right here my focus changes. Is this from You?

Thank You that I get to ask. Wonder. Doubt. Fear. Change my mind. Read. Refocus. Breathe deeply. Relax. Recharge.

All these years I've thought the word 'semblance' to mean 'a little bit'. 'A start'. That's what we've got going on here. Looking for that in Your Word, I found nothing. Changing my search to what the word actually means [appearance, facade, pretense] I came across one verse. In all the translations I checked, the same one verse.

How interesting that it is a verse I thought about yesterday after reading of David's victory over Goliath. In the chapter before Goliath is mentioned and defeated, Samuel anoints David to be king. It's the story of Samuel finding David that interests me most.

You told Samuel to “go to Bethlehem and find a man named Jesse” (1Samuel 16:1). He questioned you. He didn't want King Saul to kill him. You had the answer for him. “Take a heifer with you and say that you have come to make a sacrifice to the Lord. Then call Jesse to the sacrifice and I will tell you which of his sons to anoint” (vs. 2-3).

“So Samuel did as the Lord had told him to,” (v. 4a). I want to be obedient like that! Even the elders of the city knew something was up. For they “came trembling to meet him” and asked, “What is wrong? Why have you come?” (4b).

After assuring them, “All is well” (5a). “He performed the purification rite on Jesse and his sons” (5b) Then he rushed to his own judgment. In verse six, “Samuel took one look at Eliab and thought, 'Surely this is the man the Lord has chosen!'”

It's verse seven that reminds me that we aren't to judge by a man's face or height. “I don't make decisions the way you do! Men judge by outward appearance, but I look at a man's thoughts and intentions.” Daddy God, I am so very grateful that You know my heart. Thank You for accepting me so much more than I have yet to accept myself.

And herein lies the beauty of this section! A Life Recovery Bible comment for verse one tells how Samuel was “paralyzed by despair over Saul's failure”. I resemble that statement! But You intervened. You knew what was best and You didn't hesitate to make it happen.

I like the next few sentences. “It has been said that when the past is quarreling with the present there can be no future. We all need to quit living in the past after we have learned its lessons. There is a time for all of us to proceed to new assignments and goals. Recovery involves letting go of what was in the past so we can take hold of what is in the present and begin building a new life for the future.”

To this I must add my own, “Amen. Amen!” Blessed Dad. Perfect One. Keep guiding and directing me. Empower and embolden me in every endeavor You would have me attempt this day. I love You. I long to serve You. And I want to do it well. Thank You for loving us and not judging us on our outward appearances. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(621 words ~ 7:08 a.m.)

"Do not be afraid!"

Wednesday, February 26, 2014 (8:04 a.m.)

Am I avoiding You?

The question was just asked of me. I don't think so. Still I have yet to come around to being excited to be here with You. Talk to me “Dad”. Tell me, is it the mess? I'm sure it's the clutter. And the changes. And all the stuff I have left all over the place.

Okay. With that start towards honesty, let me tell You that I'm ashamed of myself. Truly! There are things I don't need, yet I don't part with them. I question myself. Doubt that I have the ability to eat this elephant we have allowed to overtake our living environment. Not only do I not have a plan, I resist making one.

There is fear of disappointment. Is that what this is? Fear. Fear of what? Letting go? Mm, yeah. NOW we're on to something! If I get serious about this, I have to be willing to change.

And see? All of this back and forth going on in my head is being met with Truth from Your Word. Yesterday I put into action the substance of Philippians 4:13. When met with a situation that I absolutely was unable to do on my own; I closed my eyes, breathed deeply and kept repeating, “All things in Christ. All things in Christ. I can do all things in Christ who gives me strength.”

Thank You for reminding me. Thank You for giving me verses and phrases for every single time I get scared. I do not HAVE to be afraid! I can if I want to. But I don't HAVE to! I get to choose. Thank You. Thank You!

Yesterday I copied three pages of different ways of saying the Truth found in Deuteronomy 31:8. It took quite some time to whittle six pages of print down to only three. This morning I look back at the end result grateful for having taken the time.

Blessed Father/Dearest Dad, thank You for this one stop shopping of various ways of being reminded not to be afraid. I confess fear right now. Fear of hoping. Fear of failing. Fear of the unknown. Fear of disappointing. Fear. Plain and simple. It's fear that keeps me bound. Fear that doesn't let me hope. Or try. Or succeed. Or fail. Fear that keeps me going through the motions of what is safe and secure. Not venturing out. Not changing the status quo.

THAT's why I'm here this morning. I am asking You for courage. Courage to change the things I can! Set our pace Dearest Father. Go before us as the Expanded Bible says You will.

“The Lord Himself will go before you. He will be with you; He will not leave [fail] you or forget [abandon; forsake] you. Don't be afraid and don't worry.”

See? You don't let me down! Taking that extra minute to make sure that it was Moses speaking to Joshua, I find that it was the people of Israel he was talking to. It wasn't until verse twenty-three that “he charged Joshua (son of Nun) to be strong and courageous and said to him, 'You must bring the people of Israel into the land the Lord promised them; for the Lord says, “I will be with you.”'”

Not only do I find hope and strength from reading these ancient words, there's a comment at the bottom of The Life Recovery Bible page.

“This verse contains an important message for rebuilders. In spite of the difficulty of the task, we are told: 'be strong and courageous.' The basis for this strength and courage is the marvelous promise: 'I will be with you.' As we face the desperate challenges of recovery, we can find strength and courage in this message. Our God is a God who specializes in overcoming giant challenges (see 1 Samuel 17 ).”

And the blessings just keep coming! Thanks “Dad”. Turning to see 1 Samuel 17, I read of David defeating Goliath. Thinking of the giant mess I have created around here I take great comfort in the two comments at the bottom of this page in Scripture.

17:32-37 “David was confident that God would deliver him from Goliath's wrath, no matter how improbable it seemed. David was a young shepherd boy, armed with sticks and stones. Goliath was a giant of a man, armed with a great sword and spear. In human terms, David didn't have a chance; but with God, he couldn't lose. God is able to provide victory to all who are willing to trust Him. We all face giants in our lives, problems too big for us to face alone. But even when the odds are stacked against us, we can't lose if God is on our side.”

17:45-47 “As David squared off against Goliath, he knew that in human terms, he didn't have a chance. His courage came from his recognition that the battle belonged to God. Like David, we are helpless in the battles we face without God's intervention. But with God, the victory is certain.”

And the Truth is, I've seen You work! Marvelously. Spectacularly. Why would I chose fear over faith? It is the solid faith we have in You and Your Word that has us celebrating our married life this day. It is only You and all You have done in and through each of us that allows us to truly be more in love with You and one another than we were all those years ago.

Daddy God, thank You. Take my fear and make something wonderful out of it. Do in and through, by and for me all those things I cannot possibly do myself. BE the God and Dad of my life that I need You to be. Empower and enable me to love YOU far more than anything else.

Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(980 words ~ 9:06 a.m.)

"Help my unbelief"

Tuesday, February 25, 2014 (6:58 a.m.)

Daddy God,

I've practiced saying it. I start out “Holy Father” then remember I want to be closer to You. Closer to believing that I really, truly am Your daughter. How does this happen? How do I come to believe Your Truth?

(8:57 a.m.)

The song I woke up humming isn't letting go. Is there Truth to be found in this Disney Classic? Or is it here only to help me relax enough to believe? Do I consider it as You singing to me or me singing to You? Or am I merely grasping at the proverbial straw?

♫I know You, I walked with You once upon a dream, I know You♫ Do I? I claim to. I want to. I think so. Yet I wonder.

Again, I resemble the father in Mark 9:24. “Immediately the father of the boy cried out, 'I do believe! Help my unbelief.'” Yes Daddy God. Help my unbelief!

I look around here. We have obstacles. Stuff. Situations. Challenges. Faith in Your Son is what is needed to overcome them all. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).

This is my prayer Dearest Daddy God. Strengthen us. Help our unbelief! And through it all I “will believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and in the act of believing, have real and eternal life in the way He personally revealed it” (John 20:31 The Message).

And this is where I turn back to the song. That song I know I am singing to You because I know I believe YOU to be true!

♫The gleam in Your eyes is so familiar a gleam, Yet I know it's true, That visions are seldom all they seem, But if I know You, I know what You'll do You'll love me at once The way You did once upon a dream♫

I don't think this to be nearly as far fetched as I first considered it. I DO know You and Your love are immediate. Intense. Real. Ours for the taking. Help me this day Dearest Daddy. Help my unbelief every single time I forget and start to become overwhelmed by circumstances. You are real. You are true. You are what matters most.

Thank You for reminding me. Thank You for loving me. And thank You most of all for never leaving nor forsaking me (Deuteronomy 31:6,8). Help me live this day as a full fledged daughter of Your blessed Kingdom. Thanks Dad. I love You. Amen.

(423 words ~ 9:47 a.m.)

"Abba! Father!"

Monday, February 24, 2014 (6:46 a.m.)

“Abba! Father!”,

Yesterday our pastor recommended we approach You as “Daddy”. I'm confessing 'awkward' right now. Do I really know You as Daddy?

(7:27 a.m.)

All this time spent reading and wondering and still I don't have an answer.

Father? Yes. Revered. Esteemed. Loved. Mostly at arms length. Don't get too close. Don't trust too much. Well, that's just ridiculous! Change my mindset Father. See? There it is again. “Father” comes naturally to me. “Abba”? Not so much.

So. Here we are. I'm searching Your Word. John 20:31 reminds that by believing... Hm, “by believing”. Here I gasp. Shudder to think. Do I really believe? I mean REALLY believe what I read?

And here is the proof. “A truth not practiced is a truth not believed.” Do I practice being Your daughter? Perfunctorily! I go through the motions. I call You, “Father”. “Blessed Father”. “Father God.” “Most Holy”...

But “Daddy”? “Abba! Father!” I would have to TRULY believe myself to have been adopted by You for that to happen. TRULY believe that I am Your daughter. Your heir. ALL the things Your Word says come from truly believing “that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God” (John 20:31a Worldwide English).

Father, (see?) right here I am thanking You. WHOLEHEARTEDLY thanking You for the opportunity to have the definitions of words spelled out for me. Thank You for the availability of various Bible translations.

Looking up the meaning of 'perfunctorily' I felt my soul pierced as I chose to agree with the picture it painted of me. “Performed merely as a routine duty; hasty and superficial; lacking interest, care, or enthusiasm; indifferent or apathetic”. Ouch! What happened to the woman who once flew here in the mornings because she just was so excited and eager to tell of all You are?

I have NOT been living as an heir! I have been coming to You as much more of a shirttail relative. Perhaps even as a red-headed stepchild. Blessed Father (again I notice) I want to change my approach.

Work in me. Empower and enable me to see me as You do. I want to call You Daddy. I want to mean it when I say, “Abba! Father!” I want to know Jesus as my Brother. Even more readily available to me as the lifelong big brother You provided me here on earth.

Abba! Father! The second part to the verse from John mentioned above says, “And when you believe in His name, then He will give you power to live” (20:31b). I want that power! Not my own. Yours! His!

Abba, Father, The Voice tells me this of Romans 8:14-16, part of the section we read yesterday. “If the Spirit of God is leading you, then take comfort in knowing you are His children. You see, you have not received a spirit that returns you to slavery, so you have nothing to fear. The Spirit you have received adopts you and welcomes you into God's own family. That's why we call out to Him, “Abba! Father!” as we would a loving daddy. Through that prayer, God's Spirit confirms in our spirits that we are His children.”

Silly as it seems, the closest thing I can link it to right now is when Orphan Annie went to live at Mr. Warbucks' mansion. She thought she would be cleaning and working to earn her keep. When it became abundantly clear to her that she could remain there as his daughter she asked permission to call him Daddy Warbucks.

I have that freedom with You. Your Word stresses it again and again. “Because you are God's children, God has sent the Spirit of His Son into us to call out, 'Abba! Father!'” (Galatians 4:6).

Oh and now this! 1Thessalonians 5:19 said in so many different ways!

“Do not hold back the work of the Holy Spirit.” (New Century Version)

“Do not extinguish the Spirit.” (New English Translation)

“Don't put out the Holy Spirit's fire.” (New International Reader's Version)

“Do not quench the Spirit. (New King James Version)

“Do not try to stop the work of the Holy Spirit.” (New Life Version)

“Do not stifle the Holy Spirit.” (New Living Translation)

“Don't turn away God's Spirit.” (Contemporary English Version)

Abba! Father! Keep working in me. Through me. By me, for me, with me. I want to live as though I truly believe I am Your daughter. Make it so Dearest Daddy, make it so! I love You. I thank You. Make it obvious to those around me! Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(775 words ~ 9:02 a.m.)

10,000 Reasons

Sunday, February 23, 2014 (6:52 a.m.)

Mm, Father,

Thank You. I woke up singing to You. The tune first. Unsure even what it was. Then I recognized it. ♫10,000 Reasons♫

Able to readily find the lyrics, here I sit considering them. Taking a page from yesterday's playbook, I rejoice in the fact that I want to ♫Bless the Lord, O my soul O my soul Worship His holy name Sing like never before O my soul I'll worship Your holy name♫

So tell me, what does that even look like to You? I call out to You. I want to bless You. To worship Your holy name. But just because I want to, it doesn't change this stubborn streak I've developed. There's still a part of me that claims it doesn't care.

I sense it. I feel it. I try ignoring it. Pretending. Acting as if. Wishing, even attempting to pray it away. YOU know my heart, my soul, my mind, my strength. You know my self talk. Let Your voice speak loudest!

Oh, and it does. Psalm 25:1-2a, “I offer You my heart, Lord God, and I trust You.” And I do. I truly do. Yet, I must confess I know I am not living according to Your will. I continue making less than best choices for myself. There's so much I am refusing to care about. To participate in. “It doesn't matter” seems to have become my mantra. You can change all this.

I want to let go of it all and let You be God of my life. Romans 12:1-2 tells us, “Dear friends, God is good, So I beg you to offer your bodies to Him as a living sacrifice, pure and pleasing. That's the most sensible way to serve God. Don't be like the people of this world, but let God change the way you think. Then you will know how to do everything that is good and pleasing to Him.”

Going through the motions, acting as if, faking it 'til we make it can't possibly be what is good and pleasing to You. You are... I started to say, “Truth” and wanted the verse to back that up. Then “good”.

Reading a mini-article in The Learning Bible entitled “I Am” I was referred to Your words in Exodus 3:14. “God said to Moses: I am the eternal God. So tell them [the people of Israel] that the Lord, whose name is 'I Am,' has sent you.”

You remind me of all You are. Which helps me remember that 'You are God so I don't have to be.' Father, there is great freedom in letting You be the God You already are. The God You've always been. The God You ever will be.

Forgive me my self-absorption. Forgive the whines and moans. The “I don't want to”s. The “who cares” and “it doesn't matter”s. I feel quite brat-like and I'd truly like to make better choices. For You!

So here I come back full circle to singing where we began ♫The sun comes up, it's a new day dawning It's time to sing Your song again Whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me Let me be singing when the evening comes♫

Yes Father! Songs of praise. Of hope. ♫You're rich in love, and You're slow to anger Your name is great, and Your heart is kind For all Your goodness I will keep on singing Ten thousand reasons for my heart to find♫

Do Your work in me that I will serve You faithfully this day. I love You Father. And I long to please You with my choices. Do in and with, by and for me all that which I cannot. I love You. Thank You. Amen.

(624 words ~ 8:43 a.m.)

I get to want You!

Saturday, February 22, 2014 (9:11 a.m.)

Most Holy Father God,

Thank You. Thank You that I get to be here with You right now because I want to be, not because I have to be! Thank You that You created that desire. Thank You that I get to scour resources finding Your Word to back up this thought.

Deuteronomy 4:29 (Contemporary English Version), “In all your troubles, you may finally decide that you want to worship only the Lord. And if you turn back to Him and obey Him completely, He will again be Your God.”

Matthew 6:33 (New Living Translation) “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need.”

(10:10 a.m.)

Most Holy God, not only do I get to want to be here with You, I also am blessed by the various ways Your Word is translated and paraphrased. I get to read different words and phrases all telling me the same thing. You love me and You want me to love You more than anything else.

The Life Recovery Bible has many comments dealing with faith. Under RECOVERY THEMES for the book of Romans, Our Universal Need says, “All of us has sinned; we have each fallen short of God's standards... we have been addicted to ignoring God's will. We are all powerless in our sin and need God to save us.”

Further down in this same section, following The Role of Faith it mentions Romans 1:17 and the importance of trusting You. The words I underlined long ago serve as a comforting reminder. “There is no magic formula for this – it [faith] is a daily act of trust, putting our hand in the hand of the all-powerful God, who promises never to forsake us, and to always love us no matter how unlovable we are.” Oh amen. Amen, Father God!

Two translations present this verse as such, (The Voice) “You see, in the good news, God's restorative justice is revealed. And as we will see, it begins with and ends in faith. As the Scripture [Habakkuk 2:4] declares, 'By faith the just will obtain life.'”

Worldwide English, “The good news shows how God puts a person right. God puts a person right when that person believes in His Son and keeps on believing. The holy writings say, 'A person who is put right because he believes, will live for ever.'”

And then I get to read this comment about the verse from Habakkuk. “We have discovered that without God, we cannot live a healthy and meaningful life. We soon become enslaved to something... in an effort to fill the empty space that only God can fill... Notice that being righteous does not depend on our doing the right things. It has to do with trusting God. We can be righteous, no matter how terrible our past, by believing and following God's plan for us.”

Blessed Father, You allow me to struggle. To run in the opposite direction of all You have for me. And the second I decide that I want You, I get to come back. You not only allow me, You empower me. That is what I ask of You this day. Please Father, empower me to want what it is You have in store. I love You. Thank You that I get to want You! Use me well this day. Thank You. I love You. Amen. 

(575 words ~ 10:47 a.m.)

decisions

Friday, February 21, 2014 (8:01 a.m.)

Most Holy, Loving God and Father,

I love You. I thank You. And I ask You to guide our time here together this day. I get distracted. I start to wonder. Then I wander. Pull me back to where in Your Word You would have me.

(10:53 a.m.)

Twenty-three different sections in The Message deal with 'decisions'.

Twenty-three sections that enlightened, enraptured and/or pierced my already wandering state. Father, I've got nothing of worth to offer You this day. Your Word says it all. It warns. It encourages. It reminds. And I nod. Agree. Then fear. Fear because I don't want to say, “Yes” to You when I know that I am not prepared to follow through.

I know Your Word to be Truth. I have experienced it again and again as such. Yet I balk. I start to get on board with Your direction then find myself backing out. Father, You know my heart. My will. My wanderings. Right me to YOUR will. Empower me to make the decisions that will point to You as all glorious.

You alone are our One God (Deuteronomy 6:4). You are our hope (Psalm 46:1). And as such I WILL accept Paul's prayer “for you Gentiles that God who gives you hope will keep you happy and full of peace as you believe in Him. I pray that God will help you overflow with hope in Him though the Holy Spirit's power within you” (Romans 15:13 The Living Bible).

Who will help me? YOU will! Who's power is in me? The Holy Spirit's. What is my task? Believe! Believe in Who? Jesus, according to verse 12, “And the prophet Isaiah [see Isaiah 11] said, 'There shall be an Heir in the house of Jesse, and He will be King over the Gentiles; they will pin their hopes on Him alone'.”

All this to bring me back around to singing what I started hours ago. ♫I have decided to follow Jesus... no turning back, no turning back♫ It doesn't seem like such a difficult decision to make. Kind of a no-brainer. But I have to be honest with You Father, I'm afraid of disappointing You.

Even here You bless me with another verse. This one in Jesus' own words. “When He came back to his disciples, He found them sound asleep. He said to Peter, 'Can't you stick it out with me a single hour? Stay alert; be in prayer so you don't wander into temptation without even knowing you're in danger. There is a part of you that is eager, ready for anything in God. But there's another part that's as lazy as an old dog sleeping by the fire'.” (Matthew 26:40-41)

And right in the midst of once again feeling hopeful, a confrontation I didn't expect to have takes me back to yesterday's unfinished prayer about things which are unexpected.

So here Father, I am leaving. Leaving to get busy. Leaving to take action. Leaving, yet staying connected to You ASKING that You would go above, beneath, before, behind, beside and within me in ALL my interactions this day. I am seemingly in a state of creating disasters where there doesn't need to be any.

Cover me Father, from all attacks that may present themselves. I love You. I need You. I want You. And I thank You. For Your mercy and Your grace. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(574 words ~ 12:25 p.m.)

unexpected

Thursday, February 20, 2014 (6:45 a.m.)

Most Holy Father God,

How I thank You for Your presence in our lives. You keep giving us unexpected surprises. A visit from a long time friend. A potential opportunity to visit again next week.

Your Word tells us Jesus said to “Watch, because you do not know what day your Lord will come” (Matthew 24:42).

ALL things

Wednesday, February 19, 2014 (8:35 a.m.)

Most Holy God,

I'm at a loss right now. Don't know what to say. Or how to say it. People are hurting. Fear is eminent. Loss profound. And there's not one iota of which You are unaware.

You are God. You are good. Kind. Merciful. Trustworthy. Faithful. You KNOW the plans You have for us. Plans for good and not for evil. Plans to give us a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11). I believe this.

I believe You. I believe that even when we don't understand, especially when it's anything but what we think we want, You know what is best. And You will work ALL things together for Your good (Romans 8:28).

I confess Blessed Father, I have no idea what Your good looks like. I see only through my own earthly eyes. I don't grasp Your greater good. I see pain. Fear. And I see it all through tears of sadness, not joy.

Joy comes in the morning. Psalm 30:5 promises us this. And I am learning to trust You at Your Word. I pray for friends and loved ones that are hurting Dearest Father. There are uncertainties. Painful anniversaries. Decisions to be made. Cover them all Blessed God. Wrap them each securely in Your powerfully comforting blanket of love.

Tears continue stinging my eyes. Barely falling. Reminding me of the hurt and the fear and the pain of others. Oh how I ask You Father, comfort them. Do for each of them all that I cannot.

I pray “according to Your will” (1John 5:14-15) Blessed Father. Your will. Your Way. Your strength. Your power. Your comfort. Your grace. Your love. And now the tears roll free. Thank You Father.

Thank You for Your presence. Thank You for Your plan. Thank You for Your good to which ALL things work together. I love You. I don't understand. But I know that You are good. Thank You Father. I love You. Amen.

(326 words ~ 9:37 a.m.)

for the good of the household

Sunday, Feb 16, 2014 (5:45 a.m.)

Blessed Father God,

Thank You! You allowed me great success yesterday. I had a list of things to accomplish for the good of the household. And it all got done. Conveniently. With time left over for fun.

Father, thank You. Thank You that You have a way of ordering days. Lives. Households. Teach me what it is to truly 'give myself up to the Lord Jesus Christ, take myself out of my own keeping and entrust myself into His keeping' (Amplified Bible Acts 16:31).

A Theology in Brief entitled Belief/Faith in the Illustrated Bible Handbook tell us, “Abraham's faith was not just a response to information but to God personally... Today you and I have that same wonderful privilege given Abraham: to hear the message of promise from God, and to put our trust in Him.”

That is exactly what the Roman jailer did after finding Paul and Silas still in the dungeon and asking them what he must do to be saved (Acts 16:29-30). He believed. Took them home. Washed their wounds. Fed them.

“Then they [Paul and Silas] baptized the man and his family. The night ends with Paul and Silas in the jailer's home, sharing a meal together, the whole family rejoicing that they have come to faith in God” (Acts 16:32-34 The Voice).

When I mention “for the good of the household”, Blessed Father God THAT'S what I'm talking about! Make it so Blessed Father! Make it so.

I love You. I long to serve You, as You so rightly desire and deserve to be served. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(277 words ~ 7:40 a.m.)

abundantly blessed

Saturday, February 15, 2014 (6:00 a.m.)

Most Holy God,

Thank You. It was a rough night. Sleep was quite interrupted. Thoughts spun. Dreams were sparse. Mm, but You are not!

What is the opposite meaning of sparse? Abundant! You fill our lives with abundance.

The moon was full last night. Seen very low in the eastern sky. Full and beautiful. The first thing I saw this morning, framed perfectly through a west facing window, was the moon. Still full and beautiful. Father God You fill our lives with fullness and beauty.

Looking up the word abundant in The Message I read right passed the first entry several times before actually settling in on it. Father God, You absolutely never fail to amaze me. Thank You!

I chose to read again in Daniel (Chapter 4) of King Nebuchadnezzar's dream about a huge tree with beautiful leaves and abundant fruit. His refusal to heed Daniel's warning to turn from his sin and do right (v. 27). His seven years in the fields eating grass like the cows (33). And his looking up to heaven, praising and worshiping You after his sanity returned (34).

Then I turned to Daniel's time in the lion den (Chapter 6) and King Darius' proclamation of abundant peace (vs. 25-26) to his people as he decreed them to worship and fear You.

Father, thank You for reminding me of Your abundance. And it is here, after turning first this way then another, that I go back to look up Proverbs 11:25. The first verse I saw.

“The one who blesses others is abundantly blessed; those who help others are helped.”

Blessed Father, I sit here awed [and again I joke, “odd!”]. You really do speak to us. The Living Bible links verse 24 with 25 and says, “It is possible to give away and become richer! It is also possible to hold on too tightly and lose everything. Yes, the liberal man shall be rich! By watering others, he waters himself.”

How I ask You Father to keep working in me to this end. The Life Recovery Bible adds this comment, “Some of us may wonder how we can be expected to give anything away... When we share our victories, even our failures, others will be strengthened for the battles ahead.”

You are doing this in me. I believe I'm working at it far more slowly than You would have me. Right here, right now I ask that You would get me with YOUR program! Adjust my thinking. Do in and with, by and for me all that I truly am unable to do on my own.

YOU are good. Mighty. Faithful. Powerful. Able. I am not. But I trust You and I ask You to “remove all these defects of character” that keep me from truly living - abundantly blessed.

Thank You Father. I love You so much. Use me this day as You wish. Thank You. Amen.

(491 words ~ 7:40 a.m.)

sharing

Friday, February 14, 2014 (6:23 a.m.)

Holy Father God,

I love You. Today's date is best known for sharing symbols of love. I'm asking You to share with me that which You would have me share with others.

Isaiah 58:7, “What I'm interested in seeing you do is: sharing your food with the hungry, inviting the homeless poor into your homes, putting clothes on the shivering ill-clad, being available to your own families.”

I'm confessing to You right now, I don't share well. You know that. You see my desire. You know my heart. I feel Your promptings and still I hold back. “Might get hurt.” Taken advantage of. “Burned.” It's all happened before. The guard is up. Heart hardened.

This is definitely not the fluff I was planning to offer You today. Lacy hearts, flowery words. No, no. You truly took me at my request. “Share with others.” Ack! Blessed Father, teach me how.

Philippians 2:1, “Is there any such thing as Christians cheering each other up? Do you love me [Paul] enough to want to help me? Does it mean anything to you that we are brothers in the Lord, sharing the same Spirit? Are your hearts tender and sympathetic at all?”

And again, tears! Filling my eyes. Choking my throat. I recognize fear Father. Fear of doing it wrong. I've made so many mistakes through the years. Gone on ahead of You. Determined in my own mind and heart what needed to be done.

Now I sit. Waiting. Asking. Yes Father, I am asking You. On this day of sharing symbols of love, teach me to truly share! Honestly. Openly. Willingly.

Isaiah 58:8, “Do this [learn to love and serve in healthy ways] and the lights will turn on, and your lives will turn around at once. Your righteousness will pave your way. The God of glory will secure your passage. Then when you pray God will answer. You'll call out for help and I'll say, 'Here I am.'”

“Help, Father!” Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(341 words ~ 7:46 a.m.)

letting God be God

Thursday, February 13, 2014 (6:05 a.m.)

Holy Father God,

Thank You. Thank You for the desire to say, “Thank You.” Do I mean it? Not yet. But it's a start. I feel a little off this morning. Overwhelmed by thoughts of all there is to do and doubts that I'll ever get it done.

Then of course there are self reproaches for having let it get like this in the first place. It's all just stuff. Items. Belongings. A symptom of a much deeper problem. To which I come back to thinking in recovery terms. “One day at a time.” “Courage to change.” “It's not all or nothing.”

I remember being grateful yesterday. Filled with positive emotions. Optimistic. Hopeful. Raring to go. Excited about having seen looks of genuine love and caring for others in the eyes of performers. A look that was real, not rehearsed.

~

I took a moment to walk outside. I was again reminded of “All things in moderation. Including moderation.” “Step One - I can't. Two - God can. Three - I'll let Him.” Have I been letting You?

And here come the tears. Not full on. Definitely not falling. Merely forming. But I know they are there. And I'm sure as soon as I confess to You, “No. I have not been letting You be God of my life” that the dam is going to burst!

Father, I get so lost. Wound up in things that do not put You first and foremost in my life. I feel trapped. I read Your Word. Start to hope. Want more. More of Your patience with me. More of Your power. More of You. Less of me. So much less of me!

I asked You yesterday to please get me out of Your way. Is this part of the answer to that prayer? That I become more aware of all the things I hold onto instead of You? YOU are the God of my life! YOU are the joy of my heart.

After reading the Preacher/Teacher's words in Ecclesiastes, I fully agree with his final conclusion that we are to fear You and obey Your commands (12:13). And even here I must confess that I don't. I fear people. Places. Things. I fear decisions. Reactions. Choices. And I obey whatever seems the easiest.

Ah! But this is where You factor in! This is when I get to take that deep cleansing breath and “plead with You to help me, Lord, for You are my Rock of safety. If You refuse to help me I might as well give up and die” (Psalm 28:1).

I get to keep reading. And take hope as I continue praying this psalm right back to You. Verses six and seven, “Oh, praise the Lord, for He has listened to my pleadings! He is my strength, my shield from every danger. I trusted in Him, and He helped me. Joy rises in my heart until I burst out in songs of praise to Him.”

You DO listen to my pleadings! You HAVE helped me when I've trusted You. You ARE my strength. My shield from every danger. So I ask You Father. Order my day. Empower me to use wisely and well the time You have afforded me. There are decisions to make. Actions to take.

Humbly, wholeheartedly, brokenly I ask You Father to do in and through, with and for me all those things I cannot or will not do on my own. I love You and more than anything I am asking that I once again learn [practice, work at] letting go and letting You be the God of my life. One moment at a time. I love You Father. Thank You. Amen.

(622 words ~ 7:22 a.m.)

Disney parade

Wednesday, February 12, 2014 (11:13 a.m.)

Fontana, Ca

Holy Father God,

Thank You! Thank You for time to sit. To wait. To consider. Observe. Conclude. Reflect. React. Reminisce.

Father, I love You. And what's so awesome about that is I know, truly believe, that I love You because You first loved me (1John 4:19).

What a concept! What a Truth. Thank You.

Thank You for letting me see, TRULY see, Your love in action. Once again it was through my own tears that I recognized something profound taking place.

One moment all was well. The very next, tears. At the time I had no idea why. Through a very emotional time with You earlier today I realized not only what I had seen, but the effect it had on me.

I witnessed love Father! REAL, “I care more about you than I do about myself” love. In the faces, expressions, eyes and attitudes of those portraying princesses in a Disney parade.

It hit me Father. Like a ton of bricks. People were being paid to perform, but there was a true sense of genuine love in their actions. I am drawn to further tears even now, just considering all that is True beneath that which is truly make believe.

Thank You Father. Thank You for Your Truth. Thank You for all that is real and good and YOU in this world.

love one another

Wednesday, February 12, 2014 (7:01 a.m.)

Loving Father,

“Love one another”. This seems such a perfect command to examine these two days before the Feast of Saint Valentine.

I scour Your Word. Searching not what; nor where, when, why or who. No Father. Again I want to know how! We are told to “not only love much but well. Learn to love appropriately” (Philippians 1:9 The Message).

And here my eyes are so filled with tears that I can no longer see words or letters. And it's the same as all the times I've read this verse before. Because I know that I do not love as You would have me love.

The love I show others is always conditional. As much as I would like it to be different than it is, the love I offer is not given freely nor extravagantly as You provide. No. Mine is based on merit. Feelings may have gotten hurt so I'll make sure to hurt some in return.

This is NOT why Jesus came and died on the cross for my sins! John 10:10 (The Voice) quotes Him as saying, “The thief approaches with malicious intent, looking to steal, slaughter, and destroy; I came to give life with joy and abundance.”

My thoughts spin and whirl in self judgment. The tears stop. There is a firm resolve as I again consider the Truth of Your Word.

As I had originally thought, I am led to read 1Corinthians 13. But not just verses 4-7 as I had expected. No. The WHOLE thing! What Is Real Love? Oh, look. More tears! Of conviction.

Verse one, “If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate.” The declaration of my guilt goes on with each verse. I say things without thinking. My words hurt people to their core. This is not love!

“Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love... never dies” (4-8a). And here my heart quivers as I again choose to hope in Your promises. “We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it as clearly as God sees us, knowing Him directly just as He knows us!” (v.12)

“But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love” (13). I'm not doing such a great job of this here on my own.

And just when I start to think of myself as hopeless, a bookmark I fashioned years ago draws me to John 14:17a. “He (the Comforter Jesus promised) is the Holy Spirit, the Spirit who leads into all Truth.”

I am again reminded that it is not me, but YOU working/living in and through me. How I ask You to get me out of Your way that I can honestly, truly love as You have designed me to love. I love You Father. And all this I ask in Your Son's most holy name. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(550 words ~ 9:15 a.m.)

stuff

Tuesday, February 11, 2014 (5:55 a.m.)

Blessed Father God,

In one minute it will be an hour since I looked at the clock and smiled. “4:56”. I liked it. I liked that I slept sound enough to dream. Big dreams. Detailed dreams. Dreams that seem to make no sense. Then or now.

I've been thinking most of this time. Thinking of all that was accomplished yesterday. Thinking of how very much more there is to do. Always. There is always going to be so much more to do.

Thank You that this morning there is a break in the removal and re-storage of stuff. Today we get to go play with boys.

continue: hope and history

Monday, February 10, 2014 (6:00 a.m.)

Amazing God of Glory,

You continue working in and through us. You continue working and we continue believing. Believing You. Believing Your Word. Believing Your promises. And in so doing we continue growing.

Blessed Father God, I can't even begin to thank You enough for the changes You have worked and are working in each of us. And now I am in tears.

Father, the gratitude I have for You runs deep. To my very core. I read Your words of hope and history and I realize that is what we are currently experiencing. Hope and history. We have hope in You and Your Word because of the history we find therein.

You are good. Mighty. Gracious. Loving. Kind. Jealous. Forgiving. You know what You want for and from us and You don't settle for less. Thank You Father for training us not to settle either.

You are currently teaching me the fine art of letting go of things. Things I thought I would keep around me forever. Things that are exactly that... things. You are showing me first hand that there is great freedom in letting go. This is something I absolutely cannot do on my own. The ability to part with long held items is coming straight from You. And I am asking for more of Your power in this area today.

Father God, I love You. I love You with a trusting belief that comes only from the hope and history of what I read and all we have experienced in loving and being loved by You. Reading Isaiah 48:1-11 [Tested in the Furnace] is where the tears began.

Being reminded of how truly well You know each and everyone of us touches my heart deeply. “I knew how hard and obstinate you are. Your necks are as unbending as iron; you are as hardheaded as brass” (v. 4). Oh how closely I fit that description!

“You've never been good listeners to me. You have a history of ignoring me. A sorry track record of fickle attachments – rebels from the womb. But out of the sheer goodness of my heart, because of who I am, I keep a tight rein on my anger and hold my temper. I don't wash my hands of you. Do you see what I've done? I've refined you, but not without fire. I've tested you like silver in the furnace of affliction. Out of myself, simply because of who I am, I do what I do. I have my reputation to keep up. I'm not playing second fiddle to either gods or people” (8-11).

That's where the tears fell. Tears of self recognition. Tears of hope. Reading a comment for the next three verses (12-15) I am again reminded of my own history.

“Amidst the uncertainties and turmoils of life, we can derive comfort from knowing who God is. He is the God of the past, who knows all of the troubles that have brought the pain we experience today. He is the God of the future, who knows what lies ahead and can be trusted with guiding us in the right path. He is the Creator, who has power over all His creation and sovereignty over all history. We can surely trust a God this powerful to see our recovery to completion.” (The Life Recovery Bible).

It IS in You I trust Dearest Father. I trust and hope. Use me this day as You wish. I love You. I thank You. Amen.

(591 words ~ 7:28 a.m.)

The Hope

Saturday, February 8, 2014 (7:17 a.m.)

Most Holy Father God,

I love You! You keep working in us. The results are evident and we are grateful.

(8:28 a.m.)

Mm. Grateful. Why? Because of the hope You gave us in Jesus. We get to trust. Believe. Have faith. Believe, there's that word again. It continues striking its chord within me. I smile. Relax. Breathe slower and deeper when I consider what it is I believe.

I believe Your Word. I believe Your promises. Why? Because of the hope You have given us in Your Son. I believe because I choose to. And even this is not something I do on my own. You provide the desire. The thought process that brings me back to devouring Your Word and the promises found therein.

This morning it was back to Colossians where I had planned to focus on chapter 2, verse 7. Instead, it's verse 23 of the first chapter that has my attention.

The Worldwide English (New Testament) interprets Paul's words to the believers at Colosse as being, “But you must keep on believing and stand strong and true. Let nothing shake the hope which the good news brought you. You heard the same good news as is told to everyone in the whole world. I, Paul, was given the work of telling that same good news.”

That same good news that gives us hope every single day. That good news that never changes. That good news that reminds us that Jesus is our only real source of power in our lives. That Good News that is Jesus.

Thank You Father for ALL the work You are doing in and with and for us. Enable and empower us to let You work through us to Your good and Your glory. Thank You Father. I love You. Amen.

(305 words ~ 9:57 a.m.)

changing my heart and making me smile

Friday, February 7, 2014 (7:04 a.m.)

Blessed Father,

Thank You for loving me in spite of myself. I confess to experiencing a negative attitude and not doing anything to try and change it. Thank You Father that I even get to tell You that. Straight out! No pussyfooting around.

And with that said, may I ask You to ♫change my heart O God (Psalm 51:10) Make it ever true. Change my heart O God, May I be like You♫ See? Even with that sung, my first response is I could NEVER be like You!

Continuing with the song I believe it when I sing ♫You are the Potter, I am the clay (Isaiah 64:8). Mold me and make me, This is what I pray. Change my heart O God...♫

And You do! Father, You really do. A faint scowl on my face representing what I felt inside evaporated into a smile as I read the words Chapter 66. Judgment and Hope in the Illustrated Bible Handbook. I turned here looking for more about You being the Potter and was again reminded about what pleases You. “Not ritual worship but the humble and contrite spirit of a person who responds to God's Word.”

Your teaching doesn't end there. Following it over to The Life Recovery Bible I get to read comments regarding verses 2-4 (Isaiah 66) and again I am affirmed in my thinking.

You are never fooled by any religious games we might play.We must have the desire to follow You. We are to seek Your will, honoring and trusting You in the process. I can't lead and expect You to follow. I must again “turn from and deal with” the poor choices I have been making lately.

Most Dear and Blessed Father God, how I truly thank You for reminding me to ask You for all I cannot do on my own. Like changing my heart. And helping me smile. Thank You. Use me to Your good this day. I love You. Thank You. Amen.

 (337 words ~ 8:05 a.m.)  

desire

Thursday, February 6, 2014 (6:57 a.m.)

Holy Father,

Thank You! “Thank You” because You are You and You are good. Thank You.

(8:13 a.m.)

For over an hour I've been searching a song. I have a chorus but nothing shows up. Now I'm thinking I'm combining more than one and I feel defeated.

It's not a big deal. More like a time waster. But then I wonder why it won't let me go on to other findings. So again, I turn to You confessing that I don't know what You want me to seek.

I keep coming back to the letter Paul wrote to the Colossians. A letter relaying the greatness of Christ. Try as I might Father, I can never thank You enough.

No matter where in Your Word I land this morning all verses point me back to believing Christ as the true source of power in my life. Self criticizing thoughts and doubts work hard to substantiate themselves against my own sense of worth or well being. But the Truth of Your Word speaks loudest.

Deity

Wednesday, February 5, 2014 (7:31 a.m.)

Most Amazing God and Father,

Thank You. I got to read of Your Deity yesterday. I was able to review what I believe and why I believe it. I was curious and there were answers to some of the questions I had. Thank You Father. Thank You for the ways You provide our every need.

(8:46 a.m.)

Blessed Father,

May I please say, “Wow!” Genuinely. Wholeheartedly, “Wow!”

I started this morning by searching “Deity” and came to look hard at Philippians 2:6. This led me to reading the beginning of the chapter and over into chapter three. There is such a wealth of warm hope found here in Paul's words. He encouraged his readers by speaking of the joy he found in “knowing Christ personally and from depending on His strength and power on a daily basis” (The Life Recovery Bible RECOVERY THEMES Recovery Leads to True Joy).

“Don't be selfish...” (v. 3). “Don't just think about your own affairs...” (4). “Have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had” (5). “In everything you do, stay away from complaining and arguing” (14).

The more I read the more convicted I become. Father God, the word “Deity” brought me here. “Attitude” has me examining my whole being. I ask You to lead and guide me to all You have for me this day.

And just like that I am singing ♫Make Me A Servant♫ and reading Acts 20:35. A writing attached to the verse in our Psalty's Kids Bible says, “Being a servant means thinking about others and serving them instead of yourself. Jesus was a servant, and He wants you to be one too.”

I confess to You Dearest Father, while I do think much about others I don't believe I serve them well at all. I ask You to work Your will and Your way in and through me to this regard. Make my attitude, thoughts and actions be evidence of my truly loving You with all my heart, soul, mind and strength (Mark 12:30).

I love You and I long to share You openly and freely with others. Make it so Blessed Lord. Make it so. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(370 words ~ 10:59 a.m.) 

oil of gladness

Tuesday, February 4, 2014 (6:28 a.m.)

Blessed Father,

THANK YOU! I came out here to You thinking words like: apathy, sadness, heaviness of heart. I read in Your Word. I thumbed through a hymnal. I followed every lead and here it is! Found in the Illustrated Bible Handbook.

Blessed Father God, I confess to You the cloud of mopiness I have felt under. I confess to trying to will it away. Ignore it. Actively fight against it. All to no avail.

But then You led me to ♫Jesus, I Come♫ a hymn of which I am most unfamiliar. Oh, but it is singing loudly to my heart!

I followed the connective verse ( Isaiah 61:1) back to The Life Recovery Bible. There is life in this chapter. Promise. Hope. So I checked the “Handbook” to see what it had to say. That's when I smiled. A real smile. Genuine. Wholehearted.

Father thank You. I felt the shift inside myself. A release. A freedom. Under the title The Ruins Rebuilt I was directed to read Luke 4:16-20, where Jesus claimed to fulfill the words of Isaiah 61. And the words that unbound the clench on my heart.

“The prophet promises that through Him [Jesus] the oil of gladness will cleanse away the ashes of mourning when the devastated city of God is restored (verses 1-6).”

The oil of gladness. Profound words! Profoundly hopeful words. Thank You Father. Thank You for sending us Your Oil of Gladness, to cleanse away the ashes of mourning. Empower and enable me to accept and delight in Him, becoming a beacon on His behalf. I love You and long to serve You well. Thank You. I Love You. Amen.

(286 words ~ 8:04 a.m.)

glorious hope

Monday, February 3, 2014 (8:02 a.m.)

Glorious God,

Here's that word again. Glorious. It's not the sky this time. I searched Your Word yesterday, wanting a verse describing “Your glory” to use to express myself. I found several that came close, but not the one to expand upon.

This morning I'm reading in 1Peter and again I am made aware of the glorious hope that is found in trusting You at Your Word. Father, thank You. Thank You that we are called to “come to Christ who is the living Foundation of Rock” upon which You build (1Peter 2:4).

Thank You that no matter how many times we come to Your Word, we are reminded. Refreshed. Restored. Renewed. Why? “For the Word of God is living and active” (Hebrew 4:12). How gloriously hopeful is that!

Blessed Father God, I ask that You would have me use well this day the glorious hope we have in You, Your Son, Your Word, the Holy Spirit. There is hope found in Your Word. Glorious hope. Give us the eyes to see it and the hearts to want it. Thank You Father for blessing and covering us with Your glorious hope.

Guide and direct our thoughts, our words, our actions. Let me live this day to Your good and Your glory. Thank You. I love You. Amen.

(224 words ~ 9:12 a.m.)

Your glory

Sunday, February 2, 2014 (7:31 a.m.)

Glorious Father God,

I looked outside. I saw the sky. I thought of Your glory. Speak to me this morning about Your glory.

(8:28 a.m.)

I skim. I read. I turn the pages. I sing a little. I wonder. I wander. And still I do not find that for which I am seeking. Most likely because I'm not really sure of what I am looking.

Glory. Your glory. Metaphorically I see it in the clouds this morning. Factually Your glory appeared to the Old Testament people quite regularly. 

Talk to me Father. Show me what You want me to see. 

every need

Saturday, February1, 2014 (7:29 a.m.)

Awesome Holy God,

Thank You. You supply our every need. You know exactly what those needs are. Just like right now. I had no idea where I was going with this and “Bam!” [that fast] I'm reading Philippians 4:19.

What a treasure trove of Truth is found in Paul's letter to the believers of Philippi. While writing to thank them for their support of his ministry, he also wanted to encourage them toward finding joy in all things.

Father, thank You that as I turn to Your Word acknowledging Your meeting of my every need, Your Truth continues ringing true. GOD'S WORD Translation tells us quite simply, “My God will richly fill your every need in a glorious way through Christ Jesus.”

Other versions express the same Truth more descriptively:

The Message “You can be sure that God will take care of everything you need, His generosity exceeding even yours in the glory that pours from Jesus.”

New International Reader's Version “My God will meet all your needs. He will meet them in keeping with His wonderful riches that come to you because you belong to Christ Jesus.”

New Living Translation “And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from His glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.”

New Century Version “My God will use His wonderful riches in Christ Jesus to give you everything you need.”

Contemporary English Version “I pray that God will take care of all your needs with the wonderful blessings that come from Christ Jesus!”

Father, I love the opportunity of reading Your Word many different ways. Using a variety of words to express the same Truth is exciting for me. Now I ask You to help me apply Your words to this day. You know my needs so much more than I. Continue teaching me to trust You to “liberally supply” (Amplified Bible) my every need.

I love You. I want to serve You well with every aspect of my being. Make that to Your liking. Thank You Father. I love You. Amen.

(354 words ~ 11:09 a.m.)